me is jaurinata

Ah.. ghibah, fitnah.. serem deh! Mending gaosah!

2012-01-02T20:37:00.000-08:00

Sering kita tidak sadar ketika melakukan ghibah dan fitnah - dengan alasan bahwa kita "mengetahui cerita sebenarnya" atau "yakin bahwa cerita itu benar" dan kemudian mengalaskan untuk "mencegah agar keburukan itu tidak menerpa teman-teman" dan lain sebagainya. Tetapi ketika ghibah, atau fitnah, kena ke diri kita sendiri kita suka protes, marah, kecewa, dan lain sebagainya.

Yang paling berat adalah bagi kita untuk menghindari berghibah tentang tokoh2 yang kita kenal - tanpa mengetahui kebenaran sebuah cerita sering kita "mengabsahkan" bahwa potongan cerita yang kita bawa atau sebarkan adalah benar. Padahal perilaku ghibah itu dosa besar (menurut keyakinanku, dan aku rasa juga dalam keyakinan-keyakinan yang lain) karena sama dengan pembunuhan karakter bagi si korban. Korban bisa dirugikan, begitu juga keluarganya, anak-anaknya, keturunannya, teman-temannya.

Ghibah memang sulit untuk dicegah, sangat sulit! Karena komunitas kita memang suka mengkonsumsi ghibah.. Yaah, aku juga masih sering mendengar, ga sengaja nimbrung ke proses ghibah dan sebagainya. Sering juga dengan Jules kemudian kami membahas di antara hirupan kopi panas kami soal ghibah, yang kemudian selalu dinasihati oleh Jules-ku untuk berhati-hati dengan ghibah.

Jules sering menyampaikan kata-kata bijak yang ia baca, baik bersumber dari pemuka agama, pemikir, tokoh masyarakat, atau bahkan mengingatkan nasihat dari orang tua kami. Salah satunya ini:

“The person who comes to you with bad story (true or untrue) of others is the person you should least trust”

~ artinya: “Orang yang mendatangimu dengan cerita keburukan orang lain (benar ataupun tidak) adalah orang terakhir yang harus kau percayai.” Kenapa? Karena orang tersebut akan punya kecenderungan yang sama, yaitu menceritakan keburukanmu di hadapan orang lain…

Gimana? Pernah bertemu orang seperti di atas? :) *cukup rahasiakan di hatimu. Jangan teruskan ke yang lain.

Pernah di-ghibah? Pernah di fitnah? Ga usah kecewa. Hampir semua kita mungkin pernah mengalaminya. Itu berkah dan pengajaran dari Allah menurut kamusku) untuk kita naik kelas - dan untuk mengingatkan bahwa di-ghibah atau di-fitnah itu tidak enak serta merugikan - jadi kalau tidak mau dirugikan, mungkin memulai dengan tidak merugikan orang lain. Ini pemikiran aku aja loh.. berkenan diterima, tidak berkenan ya tinggalkan :) - Kalo merasa ga pas juga, mending ya tanya orangnya langsung.

Sementara pemikiran dari Al-Quran yang gw rangkum co-pas dari beberapa site (enjoy reading!)

Ghibah atau ghaibah adalah menuturkan aib (cela) seseorang dibelakangnya. Hukum ghibah adalah haram. Ada salah kaprah ditengah-tengah masyarakat kita, misalnya dengan perkataan “apa yang saya omongin ini bukan ghibah lho … ini kenyataan”. Dia kira kalau yang diomongin itu berupa fakta,maka bukan terbilang ghibah, justru ghibah itu menggunjing kenyataan-kenyataan buruk orang lain, kalau yang dibicarakan itu tidak sesuai kenyataan, malah disebut fitnah.

Seperti dijelaskan disini Definisi Hukum Syara’, Akal dan Adat, dimana disitu dijelaskan Hukum syara’, ialah firman Allah yang berhubungan dengan segala pekerjaan orang-orang mukallaf, berupa perintah (thalab) atau mubah (ibahah) dan keduanya mempunyai sandaran (wadla’). Maka hukum dari ghibah pun ada yang diperbolehkan.

6 Ghibah Yang Diperbolehkan :

1. Bagi orang yang teraniaya

Ketika ada orang yang teraniaya, dia boleh membongkar aib orang yang menganiayanya dan menyampaiaknnya kepada pihak-pihak yang mampu menolak/melawan kedholiman orang tersebut. Dengan demikian orang yang teraniaya tetap diharamkan menuturkan kejelekan si dholim kepada pihak atau orang-orang yang tidak memiliki kemampuan mencegah kedholiman orang tersebut. Pihak-pihak yang berkompeten bisa berupa pihak berwenang atau tokoh-tokoh masyarakat yang memiliki kewibawaan dan kemampuan melawan tindakan aniaya anggota masyarakat dilingkungannya.

2. Mengharap Pertolongan

Diperbolehkan menuturkan perbuatan maksiat orang lain dengan tujuan meminta pertolongan kepada pihak yang mempunyai kekuasaan mencegah maksiat atau kemunkaran. bahkan kadang wajib membuka perbuatan dosa orang lain andai dipandang perbuatannya itu membahayakan agama, meskipun yang berbuat dosa itu seorang ‘alim atau orang awam.

3. Untuk Meminta Fatwa

Ketika kita meminta fatwa hukum dari sebuah perbuatan orang lain, maka kita diperbolehkan menuturkan perbuatan buruk orang tersebut untuk memberikan contoh atau gambaran yang jelas. Apakah perbuatan orang itu baik atau buruk berdasarkan hukum-hukum syari’at. Dengan tujuan, kalau itu perbutan baik akan ditiru, kalau itu perbuatan salah, maka akan dihindarinya.

4. Shock Therapy

Keburukan orang dibeberkan dengan tujuan agar orang lain takut mengikuti perbuatan buruk tersebut, seperti perbuatan korupsi yang sudah merajalela, keburukan koruptor dijadikan headline di media-media sebagai shock therapy agar menjadi pelajaran dan membuat orang lain berpikir ulang untuk menirunya.

5. Menjelaskan Keberadaan Seseorang

Diperbolehkan menuturkan kekurangan orang lain, misalnya cacat tubuh dengan tujuan menjelaskan identitas seseorang. Misalnya, ada orang datang kepada kita mencari orang yang bernama ngajiyo,sedangkan ngajiyo di RT kita ada 2 orang, ngajiyo yang tangan kanannya buntung dan ngajiyo yang tangannya normal. maka orang yang mencari atau kita yang ditanyai boleh menuturkan, “apakah ngajiyo yang dimaksud itu ngajiyo yang tangan kanannya buntung atau tidak?”.

6. Keburukan Yang Sudah Dilegalkan

Kemaksiatan yang sudah dilegalkan seperti prostitusi,perjudian,mabuk-mabukan itu diperbolehkan dibeber keburukannya. Atau perbuatan durhaka yang dilakukan dengan terang-terangan seperti saat siang hari di bulan ramadhan tidak puasa, makan-minum diluar rumah,padahal dia seorang muslim,maka diperbolehkan menuturkan keburukan orang tersebut.

Demikianlah 6 kondisi yang diperbolehkan ghibah didalamnya, seperti yang dijelaskan Syaikh Ahmad Rifa’i di dalam kitab Bayan kurasan 2. Semoga kita dihindarkan dari dosa menggunjing. amin.(zid)

----

Kafarat Ghibah; Solusi Bagi yang Terjerumus Ghibah

Oleh: Badrul Tamam

Alhamdulillah, segala puji bagi Allah atas anugerah nikmat Islam, iman, dan nikmat-nikmat lainnya tiada terkira. Shalawat dan dalam semoga terlimpah kepada baginda Rasulillah Shallallahu 'Alaihi Wasallam, kelularga dan para sahabatnya.

Ghibah adalah perbuatan haram dan termasuk dosa besar. Keharamannya disebutkan secara langsung dalam Al-Qur'an. Namun hampir setiap muslim pernah melakukannya. Padahal mungkin mereka tahu, seorang penggunjing diancam dengan siksa keras di sisi Allah Ta'ala,

Allah Ta'ala menerangkan tentang haramnya ghibah,

وَلَا يَغْتَبْ بَعْضُكُمْ بَعْضًا أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَنْ يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ تَوَّابٌ رَحِيمٌ

"Dan janganlah sebahagian kamu menggunjing sebahagian yang lain. Sukakah salah seorang di antara kamu memakan daging saudaranya yang sudah mati? Maka tentulah kamu merasa jijik kepadanya. Dan bertakwalah kepada Allah. Sesungguhnya Allah Maha Penerima tobat lagi Maha Penyayang." (QS. Al-Hujuraat: 12)

Ibnu Katsir rahimahullah dalam menafsirkan ayat ghibah di atas mengatakan, "Ghibah (menggunjing) diharamkan menurut ijma'. Tidak ada pengecualian darinya kecuali jika ada mashlahat yang lebih, seperti dalam konteks jarh wa ta'dil dan nasihat."

Imam al-Qurthubi rahimahullah mengatakan, "Ijma' menyatakan bahwa ghibah termasuk salah satu dari dosa besar. Dan wajib bertaubat kepada Allah darinya."

Cukuplah kalimat permisalan yang disebutkan Al-Qur'an menunjukkan keharaman dan buruknya perbuatan ghibah, yaitu "Sukakah salah seorang di antara kamu memakan daging saudaranya yang sudah mati? Maka tentulah kamu merasa jijik kepadanya."

Dalam konteks ini Allah memburukkan perilaku ghibah agar orang-orang menjauhinya. Sebab seluruh manusia pasti menganggap perbuatan memakan daging manusia sebagai sesuatu yang menjijikkan. Terlebih yang dimakan adalah saudara kandungnya sendiri ataupun saudara seiman. Lalu bagaimana kalau yang dimakan adalah daging yang sudah busuk?!

Al-Qurthubi mengatakan, "Allah mengumpamakan ghibah dengan memakan bangkai, karena bangkai tidak tahu kalau ia dimakan. Begitu juga dengan orang hidup, ia tidak tahu gunjingan orang yang menggunjingnya."

Ibnu Abbas Radhiyallahu 'Anhuma mengatakan, "Sesungguhnya Allah membuat perumpamaan ini untuk perbuatan ghibah, karena memakan daging bangkai adalah perbuatan haram yang menjijikkan, begitu juga ghibab, haram dalam pandangan agama dan buruk menurut penilaian jiwa."

Qatadah rahimahullah berkata, "Sebagaimana salah seorang kalian dilarang memakan daging saudaranya yang sudah mati, begitu juga wajib menjauhi menggunjingnya sewaktu ia masih hidup.

Dari Abu Hurairah Radhiyallahu 'Anhu, Rasulullah Shallallahu 'Alaihi Wasallam bersabda,

كُلُّ الْمُسْلِمِ عَلَى الْمُسْلِمِ حَرَامٌ دَمُهُ وَمَالُهُ وَعِرْضُهُ

"Setiap muslim haram darah, harta, dan kehormatannya atas muslim lainnya." (HR. Muslim)

Apa itu Ghibah?

Sesudah mengetahui bahaya ghibah, mari kita pahami definisinya, bahwa ghibah adalah menyebut (membicarakan) orang lain yang tidak ada di tempat dengan sesuatu yang dibencinya meskipun yang dibicarakan itu benar adanya. Maka jika kita membicarakan tentang aib fisik atau sifat saudara kita yang tidak ada bersama kita, maka kita sudah menggunjingnya, dan kita telah melakukan dosa besar.

Diriwayatkan dari Abu Hurairah Radhiyallahu 'Anhu, bahwa Rasulullah Shallallahu 'Alaihi Wasallam bersabda, “Tahukah kalian apa itu ghibah?” Mereka menjawab, “Allah dan Rasul-Nya yang lebih mengetahui.” Lalu beliau bersabda,

ذِكْرُكَ أَخَاكَ بِمَا يَكْرَهُ

"Kamu menyebut tentang saudaramu apa yang dia benci.” Ada seseorang bertanya, “Bagaimana jika yang aku bicarakan ada pada dirinya?” Beliau menjawab,

إِنْ كَانَ فِيهِ مَا تَقُولُ فَقَدْ اغْتَبْتَهُ وَإِنْ لَمْ يَكُنْ فِيهِ فَقَدْ بَهَتَّهُ

"Jika yang engkau bicarakan ada pada dirinya berarti engkau telah menggunjingnya, dan jika tidak ada pada dirinya maka sungguh engkau telah berbuat dusta." (HR. Muslim)

Al-Hasan al-Bashri berkata, "Ghibah (menggunjing) ada tiga bentuk, semuanya terdapat dalam Kitabullah Ta'ala: ghibah, ifkun, buhtan. Adapun Ghibah adalah engkau berkata tentang saudaramu apa yang ada pada dirinya. Sementara Ifkun (berita bohong), engkau berbicara tentangnya sebagaimana kabar yang sampai kepadamu. Sedangkan Buhtan (dusta), engkau membicarakan keburukan saudaramu yang tidak ada padanya." (Dinukil dari Tafsir al-Qurtubi)

Bahaya Ghibah

Letak parahnya perbuatan ghibah dapat dilihat dari dua sisi: Pertama, ghibah (menggunjing) berkaitan dengan hak hamba, dosanya lebih berbahaya karena kezalimannya merembet kepada manusia.

Kedua, ghibah merupakan maksiat yang dikerjakan dengan ringan oleh kebanyakan manusia kecuali orang yang dirahmati Allah. Dan sesuatu yang ringan yang biasa dikerjakan manusia biasanya dianggap sepele, padahal dosanya sangat besar di sisi Allah.

Kafarat Dosa Ghibah (Menggunjing)

Jika seseorang terjerumus ke dalam perbuatan ghibah (menggunjing) hendaknya ia menyesali perbuatannya, meninggalkannya, bertekad tidak akan mengulanginya, memohon ampun kepada Allah, dan bertaubat kepada-Nya. Dan pintu Taubat senantiasa terbuka bagi orang yang berdosa lalu menyesalinya. Hanya saja, dosa menggunjing ada kaitan dengan makhluk. Sedangkan di antara syarat taubat yang memiliki sangkutan hak adami adalah dengan meminta kehalalan dan maafnya.

Diriwayatkan dari Abu Hurairah Radhiyallahu 'Anhu, Rasulullah Shallallahu 'Alaihi Wasallam bersabda,

مَنْ كَانَتْ لَهُ مَظْلَمَةٌ لِأَخِيهِ مِنْ عِرْضِهِ أَوْ شَيْءٍ فَلْيَتَحَلَّلْهُ مِنْهُ الْيَوْمَ قَبْلَ أَنْ لَا يَكُونَ دِينَارٌ وَلَا دِرْهَمٌ إِنْ كَانَ لَهُ عَمَلٌ صَالِحٌ أُخِذَ مِنْهُ بِقَدْرِ مَظْلَمَتِهِ وَإِنْ لَمْ تَكُنْ لَهُ حَسَنَاتٌ أُخِذَ مِنْ سَيِّئَاتِ صَاحِبِهِ فَحُمِلَ عَلَيْهِ

"Barangsiapa yang pernah menzalimi saudaranya dari kehormatan atau sesuatu (miliknya) hendaknya ia meminta kehalalannya dari kezaliman itu pada hari ini, sebelum datang hari kiamat yang saat itu tidak ada manfaatnya lagi dinar dan dirham, jika ia mempunyai amal shalih maka akan diambil sekadar dengan kezalimannya, dan jika tidak memiliki kebaikan maka keburukan saudaranya akan diambil dan dibebankan kepadanya." (HR. Al-Bukhari dan lainnya)

Maka seseorang yang sudah menggunjing saudara muslim lainnya, dan sudah menyebar serta sampai pada orang yang digunjingnya, hendaknya ia datang kepada saudaranya tersebut, mengakui kesalahannya, dan meminta maaf kepadanya. Kecuali jika khawatir keterusterangannya tersebut menimbulkan kerusakan yang lebih besar, maka ia cukup memintakan ampun dan mendoakan kebaikan untuknya, memujinya dan menyanjung akhlak baik yang ada padanya. Hal ini juga berlaku jika isi ghibahnya belum sampai kepada orang yang digunjing, maka tidak perlu memberi tahukan kepadanya, karena bisa menjadikan ia marah dan rusak hubungan persaudaraan. Inilah pendapat kebanyakan ulama, riwayat yang berasal dari Imam Ahmad, yang dipilih oleh Syaikhul Islam Ibnu Taimiyah dan lainnya.

Al-Hasan al-Bashri rahimahullah berkata,

كفارة الغيبة أن تستغفر لمن اغتبته

"Kafarat ghibah adalah engkau memintakan ampun untuk orang yang engkau gunjing." Wallahu Ta'ala A'lam. [PurWD/voa-islam.com]

I need to do more

2011-12-12T18:34:00.000-08:00

Migod I need to do more!

I need to do more.
Bleah.... I need to do more.
I need to do more?
More?

More!!!
More!
MORE!
Yippie... I need to do more!

:) and I CAN!

Energi Itu Mahal.

2011-12-12T18:27:00.000-08:00

Tidak ada puisi hari ini. Tidak ada apa-apa.
Selain mata mengantukku yang tidak bisa mendapatkan nikmatnya tidur.
Setumpuk pekerjaan dan cita-cita yang masih terabaikan.
Aku perlu energi. Tapi tidak dalam bentuk jamu atau kapsul.
Aku perlu perubahan.
Perubahan dalam otak dan hati.
Untuk memacu energi, seperti mesin uap terhadap kapal yang mau berlayar.

Sekarang sudah Desember.
Resolusi tahunan yang memuakkan dan tidak tercapai sudah hampir masuk tengat waktu
Seperti Presiden, aku harus membuat laporan tahunan untuk diriku sendiri yang juga jadi parlemen.
Untuk segudang program kerja yang aku rancang buat diriku sendiri.

Kadang, terhadap diri sendiri aku merasa seperti pemerintah negara "Cincai-cincai" ini..
penuh dengan rencana matang dan ikhtiar,
tapi belum implementasi.

Energi itu mahal.

2011-12-08T17:20:00.000-08:00

Kau cermin, tetapi bukan bayangku

Kau riak, tetapi bukan airku

Kau hujan, tapi bukan langitku

Hanya sebahagian kecil

Dalam jam, menit dan detik

Kita duduk, berbicara dalam hening

Tentang hati

Karena meski bukan cermin, riak dan hujan

Kau adalah hembusan anginku

Sahabatku,…

Sering kita lupa, bahwa di antara hiruk pikuk keramaian, kita tetap butuh sahabat kita untuk mendamaikan - bahkan hanya untuk sekedar mendengar...
Pagi ini.. do'aku buat sahabat teman curhat di kampus dulu,
Terlepas dari persiteruan tolol kita dulu, ah... apa jadinya kita tanpa satu sama lain...

2011-12-08T17:13:00.000-08:00

Hingga sampai senja,
kembali guratan waktu
Sejenak.

Debu Dalam Angin...

2011-12-01T18:35:00.000-08:00

Beberapa hari belakangan ini aku banyak kembali ke kegiatan aku dulu, mencoba membawa semangat kreatifitas, membaca, memasak, foto, berjalan kaki, melihat dengan detil setiap sudut jalan, berpikir soal manusia dan pekerjaannya, mereka-reka pikirannya, dan berpikir banyak soal masa depan.

Dalam sebuah buku yang sedang aku baca kali ini, ada satu paragraf yang sering menjadi pemikiran aku dan suami,.. pikiran sederhana anak manusia jika dalam kesendirian - kemana arah hidup, jika kita dilahirkan menjadi manusia yang biasa-biasa saja, tanpa prestasi berarti, tanpa dosa berarti, maka ke mana kita akan ditempatkan Tuhan. "Akankah aku di tempatkan di surga untuk bukan siapa-siapa, Tuhan? atau ... sedikit kreatifitas sudah cukup untuk membuaku spesial di sana? Bagaimana dengan suami dan anak keturunanku?"

Memang pada akhirnya semua terletak pada bagaimana kita menyikapi hidup. Sering aku bermain kata-kata dengan sahabatku bahwa ketika perasaan lagi haru biru tanpa alasan, mungkin ada pengaruh planet aneh menaungi bumi. Sebuah alasan untuk keragu-raguan dalam hati tentang prestasi, keabsahan kita sebagai manusia, kemaafan Tuhan akan kesalahan... kekuatiran akan masa depan,

Ingin kadang aku tegur kembali semua sahabat lama, dan juga musuh lama.. atau rekan dalam kolaborasi dosa yang sama, untuk bisa mengingat-ingat perannya, perubahannya, atau tidak adanya perubahan dalam dirinya....

Pagi ini, aku buka file gambar di telepon genggam yang sekarang menjadi teman, buku harian (ke blog yang selalu diisi oleh tulisan2 resahku atau tulisan bahagiaku) dan rekaman mata dan otakku mengingatkan salah satu lagu yang selalu membuatku menghela nafas panjang - ketika menyadari bahwa kita tidak lebih dari debu dalam angin... tiada yang abadi selain bumi dan langit (dalam tanganNya)

I close my eyes
Only for a moment and the moment's gone
All my dreams
Pass before my eyes a curiosity

Dust in the wind
All they are is dust in the wind

Same old song
Just a drop of water in an endless sea
All we do
Crumbles to the ground though we refuse to see

Dust in the wind
All we are is dust in the wind

Now don't hang on
Nothing lasts forever but the Earth and Sky
It slips away
And all your money won't another minute buy

Dust in the wind
All we are is dust in the wind
All we are is dust in the wind
Dust in the wind
Everything is dust in the wind
Everything is dust in the wind

"Tuhan, tidak apa aku menjadi debu dalam hembusan angin - tapi masukkan debuku dalam surgaMU. Karena hanya dengan hembusan hibaMU debuku bisa menyelip di sana..."

Idiomatic English

2011-11-14T20:09:00.000-08:00

Having the responsibility to write report requires me to think like journalist. After getting stories from contacts - fun contacts, 'stay-away-from-me' contacts, inspiring contacts, contacts become good friend and so on.. didn't matter, I still have to write about what I hear and see. And just like journalist, every writing must have crisp title, which create another challange for me. I wish I could say, "Dude!! My mother language is Indonesiannn!!! How crispy can I get on my titles??" - But instead, I googled and compile great idioms in English so it can help me picture my thoughts in writing.

Now, here are some, to make it easier for your life, if you are in my condition :) Enjoy!

A
A Bird In The Hand Is Worth Two In The Bush:
Having something that is certain is much better than taking a risk for more, because chances are you might lose everything.

A Blessing In Disguise:
Something good that isn't recognized at first.

A Chip On Your Shoulder:
Being upset for something that happened in the past.

A Dime A Dozen:
Anything that is common and easy to get.

A Doubting Thomas:
A skeptic who needs physical or personal evidence in order to believe something.

A Drop in the Bucket:
A very small part of something big or whole.

A Fool And His Money Are Easily Parted:
It's easy for a foolish person to lose his/her money.

A House Divided Against Itself Cannot Stand:
Everyone involved must unify and function together or it will not work out.

A Leopard Can't Change His Spots:
You cannot change who you are.

A Penny Saved Is A Penny Earned:
By not spending money, you are saving money (little by little).

A Picture Paints a Thousand Words:
A visual presentation is far more descriptive than words.

A Piece of Cake:
A task that can be accomplished very easily.

A Slap on the Wrist:
A very mild punishment.

A Taste Of Your Own Medicine:
When you are mistreated the same way you mistreat others.

A Toss-Up:
A result that is still unclear and can go either way.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words:
It's better to actually do something than just talk about it.

Add Fuel To The Fire:
Whenever something is done to make a bad situation even worse than it is.

Against The Clock:
Rushed and short on time.

All Bark And No Bite:
When someone is threatening and/or aggressive but not willing to engage in a fight.

All Greek to me:
Meaningless and incomprehensible like someone who cannot read, speak, or understand any of the Greek language would be.

All In The Same Boat:
When everyone is facing the same challenges.

An Arm And A Leg:
Very expensive. A large amount of money.

An Axe To Grind:
To have a dispute with someone.

Apple of My Eye:
Someone who is cherished above all others.

As High As A Kite:
Anything that is high up in the sky.

At The Drop Of A Hat:
Willing to do something immediately.

B
Back Seat Driver:
People who criticize from the sidelines, much like someone giving unwanted advice from the back seat of a vehicle to the driver.

Back To Square One:
Having to start all over again.

Back To The Drawing Board:
When an attempt fails and it's time to start all over.

Baker's Dozen:
Thirteen.

Barking Up The Wrong Tree:
A mistake made in something you are trying to achieve.

Beat A Dead Horse:
To force an issue that has already ended.

Beating Around The Bush:
Avoiding the main topic. Not speaking directly about the issue.

Bend Over Backwards:
Do whatever it takes to help. Willing to do anything.

Between A Rock And A Hard Place:
Stuck between two very bad options.

Bite Off More Than You Can Chew:
To take on a task that is way to big.

Bite Your Tongue:
To avoid talking.

Blood Is Thicker Than Water:
The family bond is closer than anything else.

Blue Moon:
A rare event or occurance.

Break A Leg:
A superstitious way to say 'good luck' without saying 'good luck', but rather the opposite.

Buy A Lemon:
To purchase a vehicle that constantly gives problems or stops running after you drive it away.

C
Can't Cut The Mustard :
Someone who isn't adequate enough to compete or participate.

Cast Iron Stomach:
Someone who has no problems, complications or ill effects with eating anything or drinking anything.

Charley Horse:
Stiffness in the leg / A leg cramp.

Chew someone out:
Verbally scold someone.

Chip on his Shoulder:
Angry today about something that occured in the past.

Chow Down:
To eat.

Close but no Cigar:
To be very near and almost accomplish a goal, but fall short.

Cock and Bull Story:
An unbelievable tale.

Come Hell Or High Water:
Any difficult situation or obstacle.

Crack Someone Up:
To make someone laugh.

Cross Your Fingers:
To hope that something happens the way you want it to.

Cry Over Spilt Milk:
When you complain about a loss from the past.

Cry Wolf:
Intentionally raise a false alarm.

Cup Of Joe:
A cup of coffee.

Curiosity Killed The Cat:
Being Inquisitive can lead you into a dangerous situation.

Cut to the Chase:
Leave out all the unnecessary details and just get to the point.

D
Dark Horse:
One who was previously unknown and is now prominent.

Dead Ringer:
100% identical. A duplicate.

Devil's Advocate:
Someone who takes a position for the sake of argument without believing in that particular side of the arguement. It can also mean one who presents a counter argument for a position they do believe in, to another debater.

Dog Days of Summer:
The hottest days of the summer season.

Don't count your chickens before they hatch:
Don't rely on it until your sure of it.

Don't Look A Gift Horse In The Mouth:
When someone gives you a gift, don't be ungrateful.

Don't Put All Your Eggs In One Basket:
Do not put all your resources in one possibility.

Doozy:
Something outstanding.

Down To The Wire:
Something that ends at the last minute or last few seconds.

Drastic Times Call For Drastic Measures:
When you are extremely desperate you need to take extremely desperate actions.

Drink like a fish:
To drink very heavily.

Drive someone up the wall:
To irritate and/or annoy very much.

Dropping Like Flies:
A large number of people either falling ill or dying.

Dry Run:
Rehearsal.

E
Eighty Six:
A certain item is no longer available. Or this idiom can also mean, to throw away.

Elvis has left the building:
The show has come to an end. It's all over.

Ethnic Cleansing:
Killing of a certain ethnic or religious group on a massive scale.

Every Cloud Has A Silver Lining:
Be optomistic, even difficult times will lead to better days.

Everything But The Kitchen Sink:
Almost everything and anything has been included.

Excuse my French:
Please forgive me for cussing.

Cock and Bull Story:
An unbelievable tale.

Cock and Bull Story:
An unbelievable tale.

F
Feeding Frenzy:
An aggressive attack on someone by a group.

Field Day:
An enjoyable day or circumstance.

Finding Your Feet:
To become more comfortable in whatever you are doing.

Finger lickin' good:
A very tasty food or meal.

Fixed In Your Ways:
Not willing or wanting to change from your normal way of doing something.

Flash In The Pan:
Something that shows potential or looks promising in the beginning but fails to deliver anything in the end.

Flea Market:
A swap meet. A place where people gather to buy and sell inexpensive goods.

Flesh and Blood:
This idiom can mean living material of which people are made of, or it can refer to someone's family.

Flip The Bird:
To raise your middle finger at someone.

Foam at the Mouth:
To be enraged and show it.

Fools' Gold:
Iron pyrites, a worthless rock that resembles real gold.

French Kiss:
An open mouth kiss where tongues touch.

From Rags To Riches:
To go from being very poor to being very wealthy.

Fuddy-duddy:
An old-fashioned and foolish type of person.

Full Monty:
This idiom can mean either, "the whole thing" or "completely nude".

Funny Farm:
A mental institutional facility.

G
Get Down to Brass Tacks:
To become serious about something.

Get Over It:
To move beyond something that is bothering you.

Get Up On The Wrong Side Of The Bed:
Someone who is having a horrible day.

Get Your Walking Papers:
Get fired from a job.

Give Him The Slip:
To get away from. To escape.

Go Down Like A Lead Balloon:
To be received badly by an audience.

Go For Broke:
To gamble everything you have.

Go Out On A Limb:
Put yourself in a tough position in order to support someone/something.

Go The Extra Mile:
Going above and beyond whatever is required for the task at hand.

Good Samaritan:
Someone who helps others when they are in need, with no discussion for compensation, and no thought of a reward.

Graveyard Shift:
Working hours from about 12:00 am to 8:00 am. The time of the day when most other people are sleeping.

Great Minds Think Alike:
Intelligent people think like each other.

Green Room:
The waiting room, especially for those who are about to go on a tv or radio show.

Gut Feeling:
A personal intuition you get, especially when feel something may not be right.

H
Haste Makes Waste:
Quickly doing things results in a poor ending.

Hat Trick:
When one player scores three goals in the same hockey game. This idiom can also mean three scores in any other sport, such as 3 homeruns, 3 touchdowns, 3 soccer goals, etc.

Have an Axe to Grind:
To have a dispute with someone.

He Lost His Head:
Angry and overcome by emotions.

Head Over Heels:
Very excited and/or joyful, especially when in love.

Hell in a Handbasket:
Deteriorating and headed for complete disaster.

High Five:
Slapping palms above each others heads as celebration gesture.

High on the Hog:
Living in Luxury.

Hit The Books:
To study, especially for a test or exam.

Hit The Hay:
Go to bed or go to sleep.

Hit The Nail on the Head:
Do something exactly right or say something exactly right.

Hit The Sack:
Go to bed or go to sleep.

Hocus Pocus:
In general, a term used in magic or trickery.

Hold Your Horses:
Be patient.

I
Icing On The Cake:
When you already have it good and get something on top of what you already have.

Idle Hands Are The Devil's Tools:
You are more likely to get in trouble if you have nothing to do.

If It's Not One Thing, It's Another:
When one thing goes wrong, then another, and another...

In Like Flynn:
To be easily successful, especially when sexual or romantic.

In The Bag:
To have something secured.

In The Buff:
Nude.

In The Heat Of The Moment:
Overwhelmed by what is happening in the moment.

In Your Face:
An aggressive and bold confrontation.

It Takes Two To Tango:
A two person conflict where both people are at fault.

It's A Small World:
You frequently see the same people in different places.

Its Anyone's Call:
A competition where the outcome is difficult to judge or predict.

Ivy League:
Since 1954 the Ivy League has been the following universities: Columbia, Brown, Cornell, Dartmouth, Yale, Pennsylvania, Princeton, and Harvard.

J
Jaywalk:
Crossing the street (from the middle) without using the crosswalk.

Joshing Me:
Tricking me.

K
Keep An Eye On Him:
You should carefully watch him.

Keep body and soul together:
To earn a sufficient amount of money in order to keep yourself alive .

Keep your chin up:
To remain joyful in a tough situation.

Kick The Bucket:
Die.

Kitty-corner:
Diagonally across. Sometimes called Catty-Corner as well.

Knee Jerk Reaction:
A quick and automatic response.

Knock On Wood:
Knuckle tapping on wood in order to avoid some bad luck.

Know the Ropes:
To understand the details.

L
Last but not least:
An introduction phrase to let the audience know that the last person mentioned is no less important than those introduced before him/her.

Lend Me Your Ear:
To politely ask for someone's full attention.

Let Bygones Be Bygones:
To forget about a disagreement or arguement.

Let Sleeping Dogs Lie:
To avoid restarting a conflict.

Let The Cat Out Of The Bag:
To share a secret that wasn't suppose to be shared.

Level playing field:
A fair competition where no side has an advantage.

Like a chicken with its head cut off:
To act in a frenzied manner.

liquor someone up:
To get someone drunk.

Long in the Tooth:
Old people (or horses).

Loose Cannon:
Someone who is unpredictable and can cause damage if not kept in check.

M
Make No Bones About:
To state a fact so there are no doubts or objections.

Method To My Madness:
Strange or crazy actions that appear meaningless but in the end are done for a good reason.

Mumbo Jumbo:
Nonsense or meaningless speech.

Mum's the word:
To keep quiet. To say nothing.

N
Nest Egg:
Savings set aside for future use.

Never Bite The Hand That Feeds You:
Don't hurt anyone that helps you.

New kid on the block:
Someone new to the group or area.

New York Minute:
A minute that seems to go by quickly, especially in a fast paced environment.

No Dice:
To not agree. To not accept a proposition.

No Room to Swing a Cat:
An unsually small or confined space.

Not Playing With a Full Deck:
Someone who lacks intelligence.

O
Off On The Wrong Foot:
Getting a bad start on a relationship or task.

Off The Hook:
No longer have to deal with a tough situation.

Off the Record:
Something said in confidence that the one speaking doesn't want attributed to him/her.

On Pins And Needles:
Anxious or nervous, especially in anticipation of something.

On The Fence:
Undecided.

On The Same Page:
When multiple people all agree on the same thing.

Out Of The Blue:
Something that suddenly and unexpectedly occurs.

Out On A Limb:
When someone puts themself in a risky situation.

Out On The Town:
To enjoy yourself by going out.

Over My Dead Body:
When you absolutely will not allow something to happen.

Over the Top:
Very excessive.

P
Pass The Buck:
Avoid responsibility by giving it to someone else.

Pedal to the metal:
To go full speed, especially while driving a vehicle.

Peeping Tom:
Someone who observes people in the nude or sexually active people, mainly for his own gratification.

Pick up your ears:
To listen very carefully.

Pig In A Poke:
A deal that is made without first examining it.

Pig Out :
To eat alot and eat it quickly.

Pipe Down:
To shut-up or be quiet.

Practice Makes Perfect:
By constantly practicing, you will become better.

Pull the plug:
To stop something. To bring something to an end.

Pulling Your Leg:
Tricking someone as a joke.

Put a sock in it:
To tell noisy person or a group to be quiet.

Q
Queer the pitch:
Destroy or ruin a plan.

R
Raincheck:
An offer or deal that is declined right now but willing to accept later.

Raining Cats and Dogs:
A very loud and noisy rain storm.

Ring Fencing:
Seperated usual judgement to guarantee protection, especially project funds.

Rise and Shine:
Time to get out of bed and get ready for work/school.

Rome Was Not Built In One Day:
If you want something to be completely properly, then its going to take time.

Rule Of Thumb:
A rough estimate.

Run out of steam:
To be completely out of energy.

S
Saved By The Bell:
Saved at the last possible moment.

Scapegoat:
Someone else who takes the blame.

Scot-free:
To escape and not have to pay.

Sick As A Dog:
To be very sick (with the flu or a cold).

Sitting Shotgun:
Riding in the front passenger seat of a car.

Sixth Sense:
A paranormal sense that allows you to communicate with the dead.

Skid Row:
The rundown area of a city where the homeless and drug users live.

Smell A Rat:
To detect somone in the group is betraying the others.

Smell Something Fishy:
Detecting that something isn't right and there might be a reason for it.

Son of a Gun:
A scamp.

Southpaw:
Someone who is left-handed.

Spitting Image:
The exact likeness or kind.

Start From Scratch:
To do it all over again from the beginning.

T
The Ball Is In Your Court:
It is your decision this time.

The Best Of Both Worlds:
There are two choices and you have them both.

The Bigger They Are The Harder They Fall:
While the bigger and stronger opponent might be alot more difficult to beat, when you do they suffer a much bigger loss.

The Last Straw:
When one small burden after another creates an unbearable situation, the last straw is the last small burden that one can take.

The Whole Nine Yards:
Everything. All of it.

Third times a charm:
After no success the first two times, the third try is a lucky one.

Tie the knot:
To get married.

Til the cows come home:
A long time.

To Make A Long Story Short:
Something someone would say during a long and boring story in order to keep his/her audience from losing attention. Usually the story isn't shortened.

To Steal Someone's Thunder:
To take the credit for something someone else did.

Tongue And Cheek:
humor, not to be taken serious.

Turn A Blind Eye:
Refuse to acknowledge something you know is real or legit.

Twenty three skidoo:
To be turned away.

U
Under the weather:
Feeling ill or sick.

Up a blind alley:
Going down a course of action that leads to a bad outcome.

Use Your Loaf:
Use your head. Think smart.

V
Van Gogh's ear for music:
Tone deaf.

Variety Is The Spice Of Life:
The more experiences you try the more exciting life can be.

W
Wag the Dog:
A diversion away from something of greater importance.

Water Under The Bridge:
Anything from the past that isn't significant or important anymore.

Wear Your Heart On Your Sleeve:
To openly and freely express your emotions.

When It Rains, It Pours:
Since it rarely rains, when it does it will be a huge storm.

When Pigs Fly :
Something that will never ever happen.

Wild and Woolly:
Uncultured and without laws.

Wine and Dine:
When somebody is treated to an expensive meal.

Without A Doubt:
For certain.

X
X marks the spot:
A phrase that is said when someone finds something he/she has been looking for.

Y
You Are What You Eat:
In order to stay healthy you must eat healthy foods.

You Can't Judge A Book By Its Cover:
Decisions shouldn't be made primarily on appearance.

You Can't Take it With You:
Enjoy what you have and not what you don't have, since when you die you cannot take things (such as money) with you.

Your Guess Is As Good As Mine:
I have no idea.

Z
Zero Tolerance:
No crime or law breaking big or small will be overlooked.

Ramadhan siang bolong - 2011

2011-08-22T23:45:00.000-07:00

.......

Manusia kok banyak yang sombong?

Bermain-main dengan kekuasaan Allah...

Memang sulit untuk percaya, jika kita tidak mau percaya

Terlebih lagi karena manusia, secara duniawi,

Belum pernah terbang langsung ke neraka

Tapi...kalau sudah singgahpun,

Apa manusia akan kapok?

Apa manusia terus akan tobat dan insaf?

Toh Allah sudah mengirimkan kekuatannya?

Melalui bencana, yang sebenarnya hanya dalam rate yang sedikit

dibandingkan dengan nikmat dan keindahan yang hampir setiap detik

Ramadhan 2011 ini hanya tinggal dalam hitungan jari

Akan tetapi aku melihat banyak manusia yang memilih untuk merendahkan dirinya

Ada si 'kemayu' yang berhiaskan 'palsu'

Ada si 'loyo' yang berlagakkan 'jago'

Ada si 'gigih' yang berhati 'perih'

Ada si 'sok asyik' yang sebenarnya berjiwa 'picik'

Aku dimana? Kamu di mana? Sebenarnya Allah tidak perlu mengajarkan kita

karena Allah sudah menganugrahkan sekelumit hati..

Kita bisa menilai kita dimana.

Masuk ke kelompok yang mana

Aku hanya mencoba berhati-hati

Agar peringatan tidak aku anggap sebagai cobaan

Agar nikmat tidak semata-maat aku anggap hadiah

Agar mawas

Aku di mana ya Allah?

O iya, aku lupa, aku tidak perlu bertanya

Karena Engkau telah memberiku hati

[...]

37 and yet haven't done enough, have I?

2011-08-22T23:24:00.000-07:00

What can I say? I am the kind of person who likes to write about how I feel - just an expression aside than cahtting with my Dad, in the old days, blabbering to Mom in her kitchen..... heart to heart talk with hubby - or cry and smile in my prayers to Allah...

In the past days, I feel like I haven't done enough in my 37 years of living in this wacky-supposed-to-be-happy world. Despite all the achievements that I have got, from school, career, family, experience, but yet... I feel like I am left behind. I dotn want to say that I am too hard on myself, as some of my friends said that I have done a lot - but yet, how come something does not feel right?

Am I not thankful enough with my life? For God sake, I am... but I know I have not done enough! I just knew it. I feel like my energy evaporated to the unknown lately, with no clear explanation. I have to change - because I want to change what I have had in my hands - to the better.

Will I be able to do that? Who knows. I am only trying.

So Allah, help me - so I am confident that I have done the best
Help me to get the what I want, what my hubby wants, what my kids want...
Help me to feel confident that I have done enough...

and dear Allah.. thank you!

Reynaz: Kisah Wang Zipping, Muslim China Sang Legenda Gran...

2011-06-04T00:09:00.000-07:00

Reynaz: Kisah Wang Zipping, Muslim China Sang Legenda Gran...: "Seratusdelapanpuluh kilometer dari utara Kota Terlarang (Beijing saat ini), terletak Changzhou, tempat tinggal suku Hui. Hui adalah suku M..."

Knowledge is Power...: 7 tanda seorang Manajer itu buruk

2011-03-28T20:56:00.000-07:00

Knowledge is Power...: 7 tanda seorang Manajer itu buruk: "Satu poin dahsyat yang dimiliki oleh seorang manajer buruk adalah bahwa mereka tidak menyadari kalau sebenarnya mereka itu buruk, ckckck kas..."

Pekikmu Bejatnya

2011-02-06T02:31:00.000-08:00

Mengepul asap manis, menggulung udara
Mata Ɣªήg nanar perih,
bergeliat berusaha memandang
Ditantang oleh gemerlap
Menjamah putihnya kulit yg terbuka
Tersingkap menantang, tawa Ɣªήg jemu

Menggamit jemari lentiknya
Bergelayut manja di kerah dasimu
Merayu menghilangkan penat
Dalam birahi laknat

Dasimu terlalu longgar sobat
Kendur di-isi oleh hasrat
Mungkin kali ini bukan uang
Tapi parfum swalayan Ɣªήg membuai
Untuk mengabsahkan statusmu

Di peradilan kau tunjuk mereka
Paha-paha dan leher jenjang putih pemikat
Melenakanmu, dan karibmu yg wajar masuk penjara
Gamblang mencerca akan dosa-dosa
Murah, ujarmu
Tanpa moral, katamu
Hingga mata-mata benci menepis
Mendenguskan udara benci
Seakan tak ada jalan ke surga

Sementara, kau juga bukan raja
Hanya pemilik dasi longgar
Kebetulan diberi tahta
Memekik-mekik dan menjerit
atas martabat kosong

Bias rupamu menagih hiba
Cuma dasimu membuatku muak....

[ ... ]

ditulis untuk temanku Ɣªήg memang bejat
dia bukan orang hebat
salah karena ia memang manusia
tapi aku tau munafik tidak lahir bersamanya.

I've got new eyes from him: It's a Canon EOS D60!!!

2010-12-23T19:53:00.000-08:00

Should I give him a smile? Of course. BIG smile. Seemed like our 'going-officially-on-a-date' is a LOT more fruitful than other anniversaries like.. umph.. I don't know.. Wedding? or Birthday?? Well. all are special. but this year! 23 Dec 2010 is one of the best as I got a whole package.

Love. Hugs. Kisses....and Canon EOS D60. This certainly adds up my collection. :)

Then 2 days later he gave me Nat Geo bag. Perfect! These pics? I took pictures of my favorite collections with the my D60 baby! {Just too much baby! Unimaginable and you read my hopes well}.

Now, let's go hunting! :)

Anak adalah titipan-Nya

2010-10-16T09:27:00.000-07:00

Anak adalah titipan-Nya

Anak-anakmu bukanlah milikmu

Mereka adalah putra-putri kehidupan

Yang mendambakan kehidupannya sendiri

Mereka datang melalui kamu

Tapi tidak darimu

Dan meskipun mereka telah bersama kamu

Namun bukanlah milikmu

Kamu bisa memberikan cintamu

Namun tidak kehendakmu

Kamu bisa memberikan rumah bagi raga mereka

Namun tidak bagi jiwa mereka

Karena jiwa mereka ada di masa depan

Yang tidak bisa kamu capai meskipun dalam mimpi

Kamu bisa mengikuti dunia mereka

Tapi jangan harap mereka bisa mengikuti duniamu\

Karena dunia ini tidaklah mundur

Dan tidak pula berhenti

Kamu ibarat busur

Dan anak-anakmu meluncur seperti anak panah

Sang pemanah berusaha sekuat tenaga

Membidik sasaran yang sangat jauh

Agar anak panah bisa melesat tepat

Anak panahpun meninggalkan busur

Yang tetap berada dalam genggaman

Sang pemanah memandang anak panah yang melesat

Dan bangga melihat anak panah yang tetap pada kodratnya

(Tafakur) ~ diambil dari lembaran buku "Sentuhan Kalbu"

Dasha, Aqila and Dzar... one day if you read this, just so you know that Amie and Abach love you all very much... :-*

nngg.. klo baru ngerayain hari "jadian" mode-nya jadi agak2 puitis gitu... ^,^ .... in luv abis!!!

2010-10-09T08:36:00.000-07:00

di era facebook ini semua posting kehidupan pribadinya secara on line.. saling berbagi.. aku? ya udah pasti ikutan..

tapi gambar berbicara banyak tanpa harus ada ketukan keyboard laptop.. :)

selamat anniversary sayang.. walaupun telat, yang penting hadir...

I tried....

2010-05-29T20:33:00.000-07:00

If you are here right now..I really want to tell you how I tried. I predicted that it will not be successful, as I see by the whole condition, by heart, by attitude that they will not want to open their heart for trying to make the best for the future and forget all the bitter - not for their sake, but for the future generations sake -

But you told me too many times. People can think whatever they want to think. But don't let it stop us from trying in doing good. What is important is effort and goodwill - if let say it is appreciated then great, if rejected....at least we try.

But what bothered me, if only they are not the closest individuals, then I would be fine - but they are close to us.

I have tried Dad, and I promise you I will keep on trying... Sigh, if only you are here now, at least your wise words can calm my broken heart.

Missing you....

Rachma ‑ via blackberry

no deal, just go with the flow...

2010-05-23T23:34:00.000-07:00

....So when really do we call someone as our best friend? When actually the ‘best friend’ status can be given to a person? Does it begin just because the 2 has secret that they share? Darkest secret even? Or does it start because the two has similar admiration or hatred? Or does it start because one of them had poured their heart out to the other? Or as what people claim, does it start with simple conversation?

Well, let me tell you about a friendship. This is true story. A friendship that does not apply differences in any perspective, but more focus in respect, forgiveness, giving comfort, understanding, and simply run their life and share with each other. It was all started in an art class.

Often they see each other in hallway without even realizing that one will be the best bosom friend of the other for a long, long time. This writing is kind of hard, maybe you will not feel the essence, because I am trying to summarize 20 years of friendship in one short story.

That afternoon they realized that they have same watches, Mickey-mouse watch. Both started to chat about their watches and began simple conversation about their artwork. Just ordinary conversation.

Days passed by.

One day, one of them wore jeans with lots of drawings on them. Then they both turned out in the same English class, so they chatted about the drawings on the jeans. That day, after school, one of them invited the other for a glass of milk and cookies. So they walked along the small streets, enjoying spring and talked about trees, then had milk and cookies in a warm kitchen. It was just simple.

Day after day, they found similarities in perspective, ideas, but also with tons of differences. They came from very different culture, different religion background, different community, different in many things. But the focus was the similarities without neglecting the differences so they can respect each other difference. The differences were used to gain more knowledge about each other, about life, about people. The differences, I think, had made them to, often, try to understand others, that no-one is the same in the surface of earth. Both had adapted to ensure the comfort of the other. Cried together, laugh together, share everything together.

Can you imagine how hard it is for an American to train her dog not to kiss her Indonesian Moslem friend? But she did! Or ensure that this Indonesian need real breakfast and cannot eat pork? She did! She provided all that, by thinking in advance what is culturally fit to her Indonesian friend.

Can you imagine how hard it is for Indonesian to understand that American drink milk? (gosh, believe me, Indonesian don’t drink milk that much in those years)?? But she did! She had milk at her home, she also had shrimp chips for midnight snacks or fried cassava to replace French fries on movie days. And toilet paper! Believe me, this simple stuff can be frustrating if you are not use to them.

Many more cultural differences…many more background differences...

This might sounds nothing, but adapting to each other for a long time can be challenging. Imagine asking for space to do prayers, 5 times in a day, at her American friend’s home. Specific requirement is clean and quiet. It was all there!

Then to ensure that the American happily celebrated Christmas, the joy was also shared, at the Indonesian Moslem's little apartment. They did Christmas tree hunting together.

Trying each other’s dinner, putting up with different background mothers (ha ha, we love you Moms!) who often get crabby in American style, or Indonesian style, dealing with their favorite fathers in the whole galaxy with super different background, which enriched them as children, to learn from both parents. One was a lecturer, the other used to work with trains. What other cool combination can you find?

They often took this certain flower, took off the petals and made wishes. They often looked up at the stars and made wishes. Looked into milk bottle and made wishes for some coins to buy French vanilla ice cream. Goods were not the issue. Money was never the issue. The whole issue is how to share and keep things balance among them. How so both can have ice cream, .. or to buy funky stickers in Shadyside.

Secretly, they have their own games. Yes, people might call it stupid today, or even scary weird, but at the age of 16, they still played house, pretended to have English tea party with their imaginary English friends, biked around the city, put flowers on their shoes, hop around dry leaves in autumn, enjoyed snow-flakes in winter, threw stuffed animal up and down the second floor window, peeked into a house with a romantic red colored wall and grand piano, cried so hard over Anne of Green Gable movie (God! That Gilbert character is just….), ate 100 soft spring rolls hot from the oven, or had “stop sucking your teeth” competition.

Arguments? Yes, of course it happened. But somehow simple word “sorry” was enough. Then basically both smiled and start to be friends again. The only long argument was when they misunderstood their meeting point on a Halloween day. It last 30 minutes, and that was too because of the biking distance from the spot to that American home. That evening both just dumped their bike, then went quiet and worked on pumpkin carving. I can say 10 minutes later they laughed over it, thinking they were so stupid.

Oh, they also knew each other stupidity. Over guys. Over work. Over family. But it did not make the love and appreciation became less. Instead, good words were given to each other. And when words don’t work, they gave space to each other. They understand when to give each other time to heal.

There was no terms and conditions. And simply no transaction. It was just about sharing. In their friendship NEVER ONCE they said they felt sorry for all the mistakes happened in their life. Even when one might made mistakes to another. Never once they hide a lie, or not admitting faults. They realized that to make a relationship stronger, it is about confessing, then forgiving, then understanding the other person, then provide strength, in advises or complains, followed by deep sigh and warm friendship hugs. It was NEVER, NEVER, NEVER about transaction, because friendship IS NOT business deal. When you start to expect too much from the other, then it won’t be called as best friend anymore. No need to have great expectation, because if you believe the other person is your best friend, then he/ she will show the effort. There is no contract for best friend. It is more about thinking that the other soul is your soul.

No empty promises among best friend.

They were then separated by oceans for nine years. Letters were sent, transformed to email and other technology.

But guess what? The power of imagination and dream will lead you to your dream, as long as you believe in it. After nine years, they found a way to see each other again, …and again, …and again. And the first meeting after separated nine yrs, was just the same as before. They still did the same rituals.

And yes, now they are in mid 30s, and yet, they still stopped for a couple of long minutes on a highway to their old town five years ago just to look at the dark sky with millions of stars. Yes, they still cried over romantic movies, still share their ice cream and yoghurt, or exchange sweaters. It was just like that....But it was beautiful!

Again, no demands, no blames, no regrets, no terms and conditions, no transactions or deals. Just simple friendship.

Today, the Indonesian and the American is trying to live the legacy to the girls (daughters of the Indonesian). To make them as free spirit, free individuals, make them feel comfort to dream and to live their live by appreciating others. One teached the girls from distance, one from near. Set good samples and convey good friendship story to them. Wishing for them to have soul mate too as they grow.

And I have the feeling they will see each other again pretty soon.

Me.

PS. This one I can assure you will always end up nice, Insya Allah. There are other version of friendship too, also stupidly beautiful. Some start with crying in a campus toilet by the mops and the brooms, another started with a conversation that started by “Hey, we have the same sign!” – how they end up next? Who knows….after all Aquarian should really be like water, just go with the flow...

2010-03-23T21:28:00.000-07:00

dulu waktu kuliah takut setengah mati kalau pe-er ga selesai.. bergadang sampe berlarut2.. diawali dengan kongsian pulpen rotring dengan 3 teman cowok yg berbagi studio.. sampe akhirnya cuma tinggal aku... di studio akhir, semua sibuk dengan tugas masing-masing...

tamat kuliah, kerja penelitian... juga ngajar sebagai asisten dosen... jadi asisten dengan berjuta nasihat ke adik-adik kelas.. harus rajin!!! harus bisa! lah wong kami aja pas jama ga enak.. jaman kuda gigit kingkong aja masih bisa bertahan bergadang dengan peralatan sederhana (suer.. aku kuliah paling ga punya peralatan! meja gambar kayu tanpa mesin.. kendalinya cuma di penggaris lurus ma penggaris segitiga rotring!... suer.. habis ga tega minta duit ma Dad) - nah jadi cukup heran kalau ada yang punya meja gambar lengkap, pake alat, mejanya pake pedal lagi.. naik, turun, naik, turun.. kayak bawa mobil.. tapi pe-ernya ga siap.. lah itu namanya keliwatan!!

hare gene.. anak2 di kampus dah berlaptop-ria.. semua serba auto-cad.. keren abis! tapi.. apa pe-ernya siap? lah aku emang bukan dosen.. cuma mo kasih semangat aja.. bahwa dgn tekno yg luar biasa canggih hari ini kenapa pe-er jadi ga kelar? apa krn tanggung jawab jadi makin dikit? ato ilmu download, copy, paste menjadi semakin mahir? jangan ya dek.. eh.. nak.. eh ... dek.. (harus manggil apa dong? kalo adek, mrk bukan adek kelas.. kalo anak.. mereka bukan anakku.. bukan juga mahasiswaku...)

nah sekarang giliranku... kenapa juga jadi berubah ya? dulu ruajiiinnn (sumpeee) banget bikin pe-er.. sampe semua dikorbanin.... sekarang lah ya kok sulit abis ya mo mbaca, mo ngetik.. gimana pe-erku mo kelar??? baru aja pagi ini baca email dari sang professor.... biasa, beliau dengan baiknya ngasih referensi bacaan... katanya , " nak.. baca.. baca.. trus diolah.. dipikir... dianalisa.. dont get stuck on the history of conflict. You are part of the elite group who is studying about peace resolution... so you gotta think about the theory too, how they are applied.... dst.. dst.. dst..." -

aku nulis ini krn udah ga enak ati.. sebulan menelantarkan pe-er.. hiks.. seharusnya jgn begitu. lah wong uda ijab kabul mo sekolah, masak sih di-cere-in sepihak??? lagian kan sayang uang sekolahnya..

jadi.. Uni.. HARUS RAJIN!!!

ergh... doain! biar kelar.. *otak ku rada ngambek*

For those who cares for cup'o'coffee and a lil bit of love :)

2010-02-08T21:19:00.000-08:00

I sit here since last night

I can feel you're still by my side

When I hark back to what happened in the past

Your smile re-appears in my sight

Coffee could never work on me

Until last time you had an ice-blended one with me

I can't believe it that I felt so free

O that can be another collection to my sweet memory

Ga Ada Judul Lagi

2010-02-07T21:11:00.000-08:00

terhanyut dalam langkah kaki

bergetar menapak

tersihir oleh mata

tapi juga oleh tautan puisi

masa yang terlewati

kadang berbalut asa semu

menghilangkan jejak tapak kaki

di atas bulir pasir yang tajam dan panas

dan ketika desiran air itu menyentuh

tercipta kesejukan abadi

yang pernah terabaikan tak terasa

sapaan alam

pasir panas dan deburan air dingin dari kedalaman laut

panas yang menghangatkan, tapi juga menghujam

dingin yang memeluk lembut tanpa ragu

insan

hanyalah roh yang tidak punya kuasa

sering menghukummu,

bulir pasir yang pedih

atau dincintai oleh lembutnya air yang menghidupkan

hanya menjalani

"Rachma! Mail for ya!!! "

2010-01-21T00:29:00.000-08:00

So one day I found a book on how to tell a character by the way they write, from where they are starting their lines, and where they stop.

Those who write with straight up letters, are people who demand clarity.

Those who starts their lines in the middle of an empty paper, don't think about material as focus of their life - instead, they love attention.

Those who likes to doodle rectangular and curve lines, love to imagine. A day dreamer. Art oriented.

Those who doodle with numbers, have some sense of logic.

My gosh, if a person love to doodle pictures and numbers, will have their logic and imagination clash almost all the time. As the usage of brain and emotion are equally balance. (damn it!)Those who keeps writing to the edge of the paper until the letters have to be squeezed into small letters, often bump themselves to the "wall", allow themselves to fall, again and again...and just never learn...as their passion to achieve things that inspire and light up their life just stop them from thinking rationally. (so where did the brain factor here?)

Those who the ending stroke of their signatures is going up will have good fortune material wise (Gosh...really? Change urs! Quick! :-) )

Those whose signatures are cut into small lines often has emotion that change every seconds depend on the mood and situations.

But heck..above all...those who loves to write letters are romantic individuals by nature...(Are you? ) - to bad, in the era of electronic mails, no-one leave their personal marks by stroke of inks anymore, just to show they care. Where did the time go?I love emails - but I miss seeing our old mailman honking his motorcycle and call my name: "Rachma! Mail for ya!!! :-)"-

Jan 15, 2010, 23:40

suatu siang tentang cinta (by Rachma)

2010-01-21T00:12:00.000-08:00

Waktu itu mobil baru saja selesai diperbaiki. Ada beberapa kabel yang memang sudah rusak dimakan tikus-tikus yangberkeliaran di garasi rumah. Mobil itu hadiah Daddy buat Ummi. Hadiah ulang tahun. Bertahun-tahun Daddy, membawa kami dari sekolah, pergi kerja, hanya dengan lobil fiat tua yang sekarang ada di tanganku. Kembali ke awal cerita, Jules menceritakan bahwa lagu ST12, yang liriknya ‘satu jam saja ke telah bisa cintai kamu di hatiku..’ sedang diputar di tape mobil itu. Dia menyetir, Ummi duduk di-sampingnya. Dari sudut mata, Jules melihat bahwa Ummi terdiam memandang ke kejauhan. Tiba-tiba dalam diamnya Ummi nangis, tapi terlihat dia tidak sadar kalau Julesta, suamiku, melihat itu. Pikirannya dipenuhi oleh rasa kehilangan suami, Daddy, yang sudah berpuluh tahun menemani.

Paragraf di atas sebenarnya karena siang ini aku berpikir tentang kehidupan berpasangan. Aku ingat Jules siang itu, setelah bercerita, mengatakan, “Rachma, mungkin itulah cinta ya? Dimana mereka saling mengisi satu sama lain, saling support. Terlepas dari argumen yang juga mewarnai hari-hari mereka dari muda hingga sekarang, tapi sering kita merasakan sakitnya setelah belahan hati itu hilang.”

Aku hanya bisa diam saja. Aku bisa merasakan kesedihan itu. Tahun lalu Ummi membersihkan rumah habis-habisan setelah membiarkan begitu saja selama 3 tahun. Tapi tetap menyusunnya kembali seperti sedia kala. Yang paling menakjubkan adalah susunan meja kerja Daddy, serta urutan koleksi buku-bukunya masih tetap sama. Beberapa hari yang lalu aku melihat-lihat ke dalam laci meja kerja itu, dan semua masih tetap sama, seolah-olah Daddy masih tetap ada.

Sering kita merasa jatuh cinta. Hati berdegup keras, kegugupan yang melanda, pikiran yang jadi tidak pernah fokus terhadap urusan kehidupan. Tapi cinta jauh lebih dari itu. Hanya ada satu hati yang bisa pas letaknya mendampingi hati yang lain. Mencintai itu sebenarnya cukup diwujudkan dalam sikap, bukan tuntutan. Tidak perlu pembuktian, tapi cukup dengan perilaku. Semua itu, walau kadang tidak sering terucapkan, seperti di generasi Daddy dan Ummi, akan tumbuh menjadi sesuatu yang indah, yang dikenang selalu oleh pasangan cinta seseorang.

Antara aku dan Julesta, semoga cinta itu terus terjaga. Begitu juga dengan anak-anak kami nantinya. Aku sangat menikmati kehidupanku dengannya.

ABOUT A FRIEND

2010-01-01T16:44:00.000-08:00

Today I found a friend,
Who knew everything I felt.
He knew my every weakness,
And the problems I’ve been dealt.

He understood my wonders,
And listened to my problems
He listened to how I felt about life and love,
And he knew what my love felt like

Not once did he interrupt me,
Or tell me I was wrong.
He understood what I was going through,
And promised he’d stay long

I reached out to this friend
To show him that I truly love and care for him
To pull him close and let him know
How much I need him there

I went to hold his hand
To pull him a bit nearer
And realized that this perfect friend I found
and is the most important person in my life

--------------

I found this beautiful simple poem and thought this is exactly precise for a friend of mine who had spent most of his years being patient with me. He knows me inside out, just from the expression in my face, he knows my every way, and always patient and wait for me to be brave enough to say....and when I dont, he simply hugs me to give me comfort. That's his simplest way. But I adore it with all my heart, for he is a true friend for life. no matter what, seemed like you are always the winner of my heart!

I love you.

life could be worse

2009-11-10T00:31:00.000-08:00

so last night I saw a kid, hungry, with clothes as filthy as it could get... I am more lucky then he is

so the other day I got into a crash, bad crash that can just ruin everything.. I am lucky because I was not injured at all

so the car smashed really bad, really really bad and I was all alone when it happened.. I am lucky because the engine was still running, maybe the car can be fixed

so I hate the fact that legal system in my country is so damn bad, even though yes, many had to put trust and believe that it is progressing, but I dont feel it!! .. I am lucky that I still can negotiate

-- even yes!!!! I DESPISE the fact that many of the legal law, the clauses are just so weak that it never support or give satisfying solutions to the victims.. I should feel lucky I dont live in some crzy laa laa land

so I am still confuse with the thesis that I can never get done becuase of too many other obligations I have to do .. I am lucky becuase I can still do it, slowly, uncertain of what I am writing, but hey.. I have got my 10 fingers to type more...

so I am tired for only having 3 to 4 hours of sleep everyday because I have to deal with all the routines.. but I am lucky, I have my life with everyone I love in it!! and I truely want to do everything because I LOVE them! and they are the gems of my soul!

so I am sick and tired of the same thing I have to face everyday, and somehow don't feel appreciated sometimes. I need change... yes, I am lucky, I can make that change. Slowly... I hope I can

so I am confuse, I feel like I am losing a very important friend these passing days...I am so lucky I had my time to be friended with that person at least.. right? am I right or what? I am not even sure anymore. Feels like broken pomises. so I am stuck here in this stupid city, waiting for immigration problem to be resolved. Just because yes, my own fault too perhaps.. our our fault, but we managed... and I am lucky, otherwise I dont know there is a place like this dry boring city like this one.

so I am mad right now... especially because I feel like I am trapped by high walls.... but I am lucky, because I can still be mad...

so I just need a little understanding, a little comforting words.. from you (cant write the name)!!....but I am lucky, I can imagine that I get that understanding and comforting words from you ..

sigh..

oh well..if I can only picture you what kind of battle I have inside my head right now. But I can't.

Life could be worse. and I am lucky that mine is not. And if it is... maybe only for a couple of minutes, hours, days, years.. but at the end.. it will be fine. But pardon me.. I wish I can really say FORK IT!!! right at this second.

no deal, just go with the flow...

2009-10-22T02:06:00.000-07:00

Well, often they see each other in hallway without even realizing that one will be the best bosom friend of the other for a long, long time. This writing is kind of hard, maybe you will not feel the essence, because I am trying to summarize 20 years of friendship in one short story.

That afternoon they realized that they have same watches, Mickey-mouse watch. Both started to chat about their watches and began simple conversation about their artwork. Just ordinary conversation.

Days passed by.

Many more cultural differences…many more background differences...

Then to ensure that the American happily celebrated Christmas, the joy was also shared, at the Indonesian Moslem's little apartment. They did Christmas tree hunting together. Trying each other’s dinner, putting up with different background mothers (ha ha, we love you Moms!) who often get crabby in American style, or Indonesian style, dealing with their favorite fathers in the whole galaxy with super different background, which enriched them as children, to learn from both parents. One was a lecturer, the other used to work with trains. What other cool combination can you find?

When you start to expect too much from the other, then it won’t be called as best friend anymore. No need to have great expectation, because if you believe the other person is your best friend, then he/ she will show the effort. There is no contract for best friend. It is more about thinking that the other soul is your soul.

No empty promises among best friend.

Other secrets? They often spent time just appreciating sunset, or stars, and make wish upon them. Cried, yes, they shed silly tears a lot, over way too beautiful clouds, or white silky winter outside the window. All of those beauty basically brought them to wish that they will never be parted by heart. They were then separated by oceans for nine years. Letters were sent, transformed to email and other technology. But guess what? The power of imagination and dream will lead you to your dream, as long as you believe in it.

After nine years, they found a way to see each other again, …and again, …and again. And the first meeting after separated nine yrs, was just the same as before. They still did the same rituals. And yes, now they are in mid 30s, and yet, they still stopped for a couple of long minutes on a highway to their old town five years ago just to look at the dark sky with millions of stars. Yes, they still cried over romantic movies, still share their ice cream and yoghurt, or exchange sweaters. It was just like that....But it was beautiful! Again, no demands, no blames, no regrets, no terms and conditions, no transactions or deals. Just simple friendship.

---------------

So, what's the story today?

2009-10-22T01:47:00.000-07:00

I think life in this ‘very spot where I am sitting right now’ is getting less challenging. Not to be un-thankful to what I have gained in life, but just simply WEIRD! Yes.. big word W E I R D !!! This is weird. Totally weird. Super weird. Superly-duperly weird.

All morning I am staring at the plant in white pottery just at the corner of my table, then look outside the window to the cloudy sky, easy traffic and empty train track. I thought to myself why I am so damn bored. Hm, the false is in me? Or the false is in the sights that I see in front of me?

I love what I am doing. Love my job (let’s discuss this later..). Love life. Love my kids. Love my man. Love my cell-phone with various songs that I always plug to my ears. Love the origami birds on my desk. Love my un-finished-forever-under-construction-run-outta-budget house. Love my pillows. Love driving around at night with loud music jamming in my car. Love to dance while cooking. Love art and doing some of it.

Miss my monkeys, but I can survive. Miss my cats but that's okay. I am allergic to cats somehow now. Miss my Mom but I can call her. Miss my Dad and I have him in my head. Miss my old friends, but they are here in this very social network planet (but they are very quiet and silence sometimes. All I can see just pictures and I will have to transform that into real life interaction). Miss walking on the sidewalk, but maybe I can do that easily (man, I really miss walking city surfing!). Miss biking just like old times. Miss my ripped jeans (I might as well wear them this weekend, my 20 year old jeans!). Miss pencil in my hair bun. Maybe if I make the list, there are certain things that I miss and I can’t handle in life, but hey I survived?

So they say I am a dreamer. My best friends allowed me to be a dreamer, for they are also dreamers. Yes, we are Goddess of Imaginations, and imaginations give color and flower to our life. We imagine things that we can’t have in real life, but we can in our imaginary life. Is that so wrong? I know kids are doing that.

Some said I am not thankful. Maybe that is true. Then that would be a project for me to work on. Seriously. I am no angel. But I am working on being thankful at all level.

But today...
I know I am part dreamy, part bored, part thankful, but I know my curiosity is HUGE and it had hampered me BAD today. Damn it, . I have to write this long just to find out why I feel weird today.

The plant on my table is still green, and remain the same plant. Hmm…maybe I’ll change it after Ied. or maybe clean my table and re-arrange everything. I hate routines! And I hate finding things I don’t like. At least this is my thoughts this very second. I know life keeps rolling.

Oh well...

Happy Ied everyone! Don't loose your heads during the holiday. Stay safe with all the great food. Come back normal and cool, okay? You deserve it! .. okay, come back with a bit more fat is acceptable!

Dad, hope the signal is good today

2009-10-21T21:35:00.000-07:00

Sore tadi, hanya ada sebuah batu, angin, dan aku...Masih beberapa tahun lalu ketika aku nangkring di meja makan bersamamu, minum teh manis panas dari gelas besarmu, mencelotehkan segala kegiatan harianku.

"Dad, Uni paling sebel lah sama si XXX.. Masakan dia suka ... bla bla bla"
"Dad, Uni pergi jalan-jalan ma orang itu ya.. Ada si Gita juga kok..trus pulang cepet kok!"
"Dad, tau gak? Uni dapet honor tambahan dari proyek! Malam minggu kita ke Nelayan ya..tapi kalo duitnya kurang, tambahin ya..hee hee..."
"Dad, mo pergi nonton, boleh ya. Iya, iya, nanti Uni kasih tau Ummi juga - paling harus pulang sebelum jam 10 kan?"
"Daddy, malam sabtu kita nonton Hercules yok! Mantaplah pokoknya.. Pelem2 romawi gitu Dad"
"Dad, bantu jemput Dasha lah..trus di kantor Dad kasih soto ayam aja ya.. Tks Dad"
"Dad, udah batuk lagi nih, ntar ke Oom Sugito ya, Uni mo pake obat dia itu..yang buat lega pernafasan.."
"Dad.. Tukang martabak lewat, beli yok! Uni ambil telor tambahan dari kulkas ya...."
"Dad, ini artikelnya maksudnya apa!? Gak ngertilah.."

Atau... dengan kasih sayang dan kesabaranmu menjaga mahkluk-mahkluk kecil - 4 orang mahkluk kecil yang selalu menfavoritkan Abuciknya.. Laporan mereka selalu..
"Amie, kami tadi joged ma Bucik di ruang tipi..lucuuuu banget! Seru!"
"Amie, kantor Bucik keren deh! Banyak spidol warna warni.. Kami suka di situ... Oom Jamal juga baek! Kami suka ke kantin depan ma Bucik!"
"Amie, Dasha mo dimandiin Bucik ajah! ..."
"Amie, kami mo jalan-jalan ma Bucik dan Neni.. Ma ka Ara trus si Ayen... "....
"Auntie, Ara maen ma Bucik ke Pertanian!"
"Auntie, Ayen maen pistol aer dari Bucik... !!"

....Setiap saat selalu mewarnai

...Sore ini ya Allah, hanya ada batu, dengan grafir namamu,... angin semilir, ... Aku sedikit berharap setiap waktu untuk bisa membuat segalanya menjadi lebih praktis.. Aku bisa angkat telepon dan bilang ke Dad, soal apa saja... Sayang gak ada provider antara aku dan Daddy saat ini. Kepergian yang memang sudah pada waktunya.

Tapi ya Allah... Terlepas segala kekhilafanku, keangkuhanku, kesalahanku, ... , dan semua kekuranganku...., sungguh, aku tau hanya Engkau yang bisa menyampaikan salamku padanya. Karena perkara ruh adalah urusanMu... Kami hanya bisa berharap dan mengkhayalkan bahwa doa serta salam kami bisa sampai kepadanya. Sampaikan ya Allah, aku kangen sama Daddy - aku berharap dia mendapat singgasana yang engkau sediakan bagi semua orang tua yang mulia...yang sudah menghabiskan tiga per empat hidupnya hanya untuk mendoakan dan mendidik khalifah-khalifah baru di muka bumi.

Ya Allah, jika memungkinkan... tolong sampaikan peluk cium dan salam sayang dari kami semua.. dari Ummi, kekasihnya sepanjang hidupnya..., dari kami anak-anak dan cucu-cucunya.. semoga Ramadhan yang akan menapak dalam waktu dekat ini mendatangkan ikatan kasih sayang yang lebih lagi buat kami yang ditinggalkan... Semoga nanti aku bisa nangkring lagi dan berceloteh di depannya, di meja makan kami di akhirat.

Luv u Dad...and thank you for everything!

Buat temen-temen yang ayah dan ibunya masih mendampingi... Perbanyak bercerita dan mendengarkan cerita mereka. Karena ketika masa itu selesai, kita hanya bisa berharap untuk bisa bercerita lagi dengan mereka. Sungguh, Allah benar-benar menciptakan surga di telapak kaki ibu untuk kita mendapatkan kasih sayang, dan ayah sebagai pepohonan, bunga dan taman hati dalam surga itu

make a wish

2009-10-13T15:20:00.000-07:00

"Dreams are wishes casted upon stars, so catch a shining one ~ take your friend's hand~ and hold on forever"

...so I got this randomly through the internet... brings back to the memories of rituals that were done just for the sake of bringging hope since I was little. Wishing while looking deep into the night sky.

So when I was about 5, my sister was only 6, we had the ritual every Saturday night, if we stayed home, to take out the pandan mattress outside to the back yard. Dad will turn off all the lights in the house. Mom will make nice chocolate milk for me, tea for Dad, and nothing for my sister because she could not stand dairy products. Both she and I were in our pajamas. Rushed we ran after Dad with our pillows and threw them on the mattress. Then four of us would lie down facing the deep sky. That time, my hometown still has thousands of stars. My Dad will start the story about his childhood, or about the galaxy, or about what we should be. Mom would sang softly..

"Starlight starbright, first star I see tonight." ... my bosom friend and I ran in the dark of early morning in Stonington, ready for a drive to the airport. Suddenly we saw a shooting star. We smiled at each other, just like almost 20 years ago. "Oooh, Rachma, we gotta make a wish, come one!" Shutting our eyes real quick and both made wishes...(Ya Allah, I wish for.....)

Well, I haven't seen my thousands of stars lately. I haven't scented night breeze lately... When I get home, I might do that... and when I see my first star, I will whisper your name and make a wish for you. ....

2009-10-13T03:49:00.000-07:00

"Dreams are wishes casted upon stars, so catch a shining one ~ take your friend's hand~ and hold on forever"

..so I got this randomly through the internet... brings back to the memories of rituals that were done just for the sake of bringging hope since I was little. Wishing while looking deep into the night sky.

2009-10-11T05:55:00.000-07:00

Jika aku terbangun di kala pagi masih belum merekah,
langsung mengingatmu,
atau ketika kutarik selimutku dan mengingat isi kata-katamu,
atau pula dalam tidur yang nyenyak, tersapa oleh bayangmu,
apa itu artinya kau punya arti bagiku?

Jika tuturmu terngiang di telingaku di setiap waktu yang bergulir,

atau pembicaraan yang kembali dan kembali mengalir,

atau bayang nanar akan dirimu selalu terbit.

apa itu artinya kau punya arti bagiku?

Sedangkan subuh tidak bisa menjelaskan padaku

kapan rasa arti itu muncul

tidak satu titik embun yang menyadarkan

untuk menilainya dengan akal dan logika

Sementara aku hanya manusia dengan jiwa dan hati yang sama

yang hanya berharap masa dan rasa itu benar adanya

jiwa yang tiba-tiba menempatkanmu di relung hatiku

tanpa alasan, tanpa sebab….

tanpa alasan

2009-10-11T01:57:00.000-07:00

Jika aku terbangun di kala pagi masih belum merekah, langsung mengingatmu,

atau ketika kutarik selimutku dan mengingat isi kata-katamu,

atau pula dalam tidur yang nyenyak,

tersapa oleh bayangmu,

apa itu artinya kau punya arti bagiku?

Jika tuturmu terngiang di telingaku di setiap waktu yang bergulir,

atau pembicaraan yang kembali dan kembali mengalir,

atau bayang nanar akan dirimu selalu terbit.

apa itu artinya kau punya arti bagiku?

Sedangkan subuh tidak bisa menjelaskan padaku kapan rasa arti itu muncul

tidak satu titik embun yang menyadarkan untuk menilainya dengan akal dan logika

Sementara aku hanya manusia dengan jiwa dan hati yang sama

yang hanya berharap masa dan rasa itu benar adanya

jiwa yang tiba-tiba menempatkanmu di relung hatiku

tanpa alasan, tanpa sebab….

ENGKAULAH PUISIKU -- ditulis oleh Zainal Fuad

2009-10-07T01:59:00.000-07:00

ENGKAU HANYA SEDIKIT MENULIS PUISI UNTUKKU
KALAU GAK MAU DIKATAKAN TIDAK PERNAH

AKAN TETAPI SETELAH AKU AMATI ....
SENYUMANMU ADALAH PUISI
TATAPANMU ADALAH PUISI
JALANMU ADALAH PUISI
BICARAMU ADALAH PUISI
BAHKAN DOAMU ADALAH PUISI CINTAYANG ENGKAU SAMPAIKAN PADAKU
TAK PERNAH PUTUS..TAK PERNAH BERHENTI..

(.. ketika aku tidak melihat puisi itu.. mungkin karena aku dibutakan oleh kebodohanku...)

Hakikat Cinta - ditulis oleh seseorang bernama Zainul Fuad

2009-10-07T01:55:00.000-07:00

Ini puisi yang diambil dari karya seseorang. Mungkin isinya biasa saja, tapi sebenarnya beberapa dari kita harus mulai mempertimbangkannya.. dalam setiap detik nafas, selagi ada...

Cinta bukan sebatas berkata kangen
Sehingga cari jalan untuk bertemu
Cinta bukan hanya manifestasi nafsu yang butuh pelampiasan
Cinta juga bukan rasa cemburu berlebihan,
sehingga harus ada terdakwa di meja hijau

Cinta bukan ungkapan sayang dan ingin mati bersamanya
Cinta bukan kesetiaan yang setiap detik harus diucapkan
bak mantara sebelum perang
Cinta bukan sebuah makna kejujuran terdalam
karena pasti ada muatan kemunafikan dan kepentingan
Cinta bukan emosi berkabut, hingga bunuh diri ketika ada perpisahan
Cinta bukan muara kebenaran setiap saat ketuk palu pembebasan
Cinta bukan pembebasan tak bertuan, sehingga butuh pasukan khusus untuk merebutnya
Cinta bukan misteri malam, hingga butuh pelita untuk penerangan
Cinta adalah semuanya, tanpa batas, tanpa sekat

aku pinjem puisinya untuk diberikan ke ketiga jiwaku saat ini: Abach Puput, Ka Dasha dan Baby Aqila

pertama kali suka krn dia naik sepeda ke kampus :-) aku juga suka naik sepeda..

2009-09-30T10:00:00.000-07:00

Bukanlah kurangnya rasa cinta yang membuat kebersamaan menjadi tidak bahagia, tetapi kurangnya persahabatan. Ketika kita memohon doa, maka ada 2 konsekuensi mutlak dalam doa tsb. Pertama, Tuhan pasti akan mengabulkan doa itu, asalkan konsekuensi kedua dilaksanakan oleh yg memanjatkan doa, bahwasanya kita mengkondisikan diri kita utk layak dalam mengusahakan agar doa tsb berhasil.

Di Jabal Rahmah, tempat pertemuan Nabi Adam AS dan istrinya Siti Hawa yang telah terpisah selama 100 tahun, begitu banyak manusia yg datang dan mencatatkan 'keinginan hatinya' akan pasangannya kelak di akhirat. Ini hanya akan tercapai bukan krn dilandasi rasa cinta, tetapi karena kita mensahabatkan diri kita dengan orang yang kita inginkan menjadi pasangan akhirat tsb.

Jadi mana yg lebih indah? Menikahi orang yang adalah sahabat kita? Atau menikahi orang yang siap bersahabat dengan kita? Jawabannya: sama. .....

Aku pernah bertemu dengan seorang laki-laki yang juga sahabat sejati. Bukannya hanya dari kegemaran kami saja yang sejalan, tetapi setelah melalui begitu banyak hambatan, kekhilafan, fitnah, dan segala macamnya, aku tetap menemukan bahwa dia adalah sosok yang setia yang selalu mau MENDENGAR, mau BERBAGI RASA, mau TUKAR PENDAPAT, dan MEMBUKA PIKIRAN dan HATI.

Sahabat yang sangat sederhana. Laki-laki yang serius dalam pekerjaannya, menjadi teman bermain dan pembimbing bagi keluarganya, teguh dalam prinsipnya, dan sabar. Imam yang baik.

Dia yang paling mengerti semua kemarahanku, perasaanku, suasana hatiku, sangking mengertinya ketika ada perubahan sedikit saja dia langsung tahu. Dia yang paling tau makanan kegemaranku, hal yang membuat aku ngambek, kemalasanku, tampangku ketika tidur, dan semua sifat-sifatku. Semua hal strategis yang bisa membuatku hanya percaya kepadanya (laki-laki kedua yang aku percaya ya Ayahku! obvious.. kedua-duanya tidak pernah berbohong sedikitpun padaku, ga pernah ingkar janji....)

Persahabatan 17 tahun tidak akan mungkin terus berjalan tanpa doa dan kesabaran serta saling pengertian. Semoga Allah akan selalu menjaga.

Iya. Hari ini aku sudah menikah dengan dia 10 tahun lamanya. Aku menikahi laki-laki yang pertama menarik perhatianku karena bersepeda ke kampus dan terlihat lucu ketika ospek! :-) Dia sahabatku. Dia mentor pelajaran fisikaku, mekanika teknik yang menggilakan, dan struktur... dan sekarang soal pengetahuan umum.... perkembangan politik dan ekonomi.. dia adalah "otak kiri dan kananku", dia adalah "tangan kiri dan kananku"... .

Semoga Allah selalu menjaga persahabatan kami. Semoga Allah menjaganya sampai kami di akhirat. Amin.

me 'wuv julesta putra! :-)

2009-08-24T11:46:00.000-07:00

2 malam yang lalu aku mimpi ketemu sama ayahku yang aku panggil Daddy dari kecil.. iya iya.. bukan sok bule.. tapi mungkin ortu lebih memilih panggilan yg rada nyentrik buat mrk waktu itu - dan iya, aku pangil ibuku Ummi.. nah yg ini kedengarn dari timteng...

Kenapa selalu mimpi Daddy? ya karena Ummi ku masih ada, jadi sedikit banyak masih sering ngopi bareng atau duduk bareng makan keripik sambil nonton tipi. Atau berdebat yang kadang seperti tiada habisnya :-)

Mimpi yang sedikit aneh karena aku jarang sekali mimpi soal Daddy. Di mimpi itu aku dan dia seperti terpisah ruangan dan pintu2 yang tidak terkunci tapi tidak bisa kumasuki. Sampai akhirnya tiba-tiba aku menemukan celah dan Daddy langsung merangkulku seperti waktu kecil dulu.. Daddy bertanya," Adek, kemana aja selama ini?" -- Lah.. dalam mimpi aku gak bisa menjawab, apalagi dalam realita. Kalaupun aku harus menjawab, maka aku harus ziarah lagi dan akhirnya berpura2 berbicara sama Daddy walaupun hanya nisan saja yang terlihat di hadapan - sambil menggunakan imajinasi - lagi dan lagi.

Mungkin, karena aku kurang bersyukur? Ato mungkin karena aku suka iseng? Ato mungkin karena ini bulan dari segala bulan? membuat aku berpikir paginya, sambil menyeka mata kiriku yang berair karena aku nangis di bantalku dalam tidur...... mungkin Daddy mau aku seperti waktu kecil? atau Daddy ingin aku berhati kuat?

Yah, gak tau lah... tapi yang jelas aku jadi nulis puisi dikit.. kalau kebaca seperti tolol ya mohon maklum.. namanya pemula yang jarang baca dan ga pernah belajar nulis puisi...semuanya hanya karangan instan di depan monitor...

[especially dedicated to Mas Puput and girls (walau ga FB-an), Sarah (sorry sweety if you dont understand, but you are included as you are important to me, Gita yg manis, Ameng yg lagi di Mecca.. doain Uni ya Meng..., Henni..iya ini temen suka curhat soal Bapak2 kami yang kami rasa top dan keren abis ...dan sahabat2 serta sodara2 yang ada di efbi, termasuk adik sepupuku Yuni yang manis..] Ini dia...

Berjingkat-jingkat di dalam gelap

Menebar pandangan ke dinding dinding kusam
Kakiku yang dingin terkena lantai tua
Kutarik selendang yang menutup rambut
Terjatuh lagi, kutarik lagi
Rambut ini terasa licin dan tidak mengerti
Bahwa, ada kala aku ingin hanya berdua
Dengan curahan hati
Hati yang kadang brengsek dan kepala yang kadang kurang ajar

Kutarik lagi selendang yang menutup rambutku

Duduk ku di sudut dan diam
Kuhela nafas, yang sedikit tersenggal ditekan malam
Mata yang terpejam mengulang semua
Baur indah dan marah – kenapa aku musti marah??
Toh semua aku juga penyebabnya
Sudah lama aku jauh, jauh tanpa aku sadari
Mungkin memang begini jejaknya
Aku hanya bisa berbicara dalam hati….berusaha menepis setan-setan

Dudukku di sudut dan diam
Tanganku terlipat dalam dekapan, terselubung oleh selendang
Ya Rabbi…sekali lagi, hanya Engkau curahan hati
Maafkan hambaMu di bulan ini,
Dan terima kasih karena telah mengerti, karena aku tidak merasakan hukumanMu
Tapi jika ada, jauhkanlah hukuman itu ….
karena malam ini, aku sadar aku mungkin tak layak di istanaMu

Tapi akankah kudapat hibaMu?
Karena aku tau, mungkin setelah ini aku akan mengulangi

Ampuni aku, karena mengkhianatiMu Kekasihku

Dan selendang itu terjatuh lagi...
Hatiku berpikir, kepalaku menuduh
Bagaikan imanku yang tumbuh dan pupus silih berganti

Tidak ada judul (by Rachma)

2009-08-23T00:45:00.000-07:00

Tiga malam yang lalu aku bermimpi bertemu Daddy... setelah pikiran dan hatiku gelisah tak berakar... tiap saat aku memikirkanNya.. tapi .. kali ini hanya berupa ketukan jari-ku di perangkat teknologi ini yang mungkin mengungkapkan sedikit rasa. Yang lain hanya akan kusimpan semata, untuk menjadi rahasia aku dan Dia...

Berjingkat-jingkat di dalam gelap
Menebar pandangan ke dinding dinding kusam
Kakiku yang dingin terkena lantai tua
Kutarik selendang yang menutup rambut
Terjatuh lagi, kutarik lagi
Rambut ini terasa licin dan tidak mengerti
Bahwa, ada kala aku ingin hanya berdua
Dengan curahan hati
Hati yang kadang brengsek dan kepala yang kadang kurang ajar

Kutarik lagi selendang yang menutup rambutku

Duduk ku di sudut dan diam
Kuhela nafas, yang sedikit tersenggal ditekan malam
Mata yang terpejam mengulang semua
Baur indah dan marah – kenapa aku musti marah??
Toh semua aku juga penyebabnya
Sudah lama aku jauh, jauh tanpa aku sadari
Mungkin memang begini jejaknya
Aku hanya bisa berbicara dalam hati….berusaha menepis setan-setan

Dudukku di sudut dan diam
Tanganku terlipat dalam dekapan, terselubung oleh selendang
Ya Rabbi…sekali lagi, hanya Engkau curahan hati
Maafkan hambaMu di bulan ini [ramadhan 2009]
Dan terima kasih karena telah mengerti, karena aku tidak merasakan hukumanMu
Tapi jika ada, jauhkanlah hukuman itu
…. karena malam ini, aku sadar aku mungkin tak layak di istanaMu

Tapi akankah kudapat hibaMu?
Karena aku tau, mungkin setelah ini aku akan mengulangi

Ampuni aku, karena mengkhianatiMu Kekasihku

Dan selendang itu terjatuh lagi...
Hatiku berpikir, kepalaku menuduh
Bagaikan imanku yang tumbuh dan pupus silih berganti

2009-07-12T00:50:00.000-07:00

- Mengapa Malam? -

mengapa malam?
kala semua seperti terhenti
angin bertiup dingin bergemerisik
suara-suara serangga saling berbisik
setiap insan seperti terlena dalam mimpi

mengapa malam?
dalam kegelapan, dan nyawa serasa tersentak
malam yang membuatku kadang terjaga
mengingat senyummu
mengingat ceritamu
mengingat mata bersahabatmu
mengingat semangatmu
mengingat harapanmu
mengingat semua doamu
yang bukan hanya untukmu
tapi juga untukku

mengapa malam?
karena ketika dunia serasa bisu
senyummu masih di jiwaku

karenamu, dan malam
inspirasi telah mengisi jiwaku

mengapa malam?
karena malamlah yang membawamu padaku

Ketika Hak-hak Kita Bersajak

2008-12-10T09:58:00.000-08:00

So last night the aura was pretty different. Tempoe Doeloe style mixed with songs by Iwan Fals, Slank and lines of poetries. Something that awaken me that I wish for a lot of young generations here will do something, in their little world, to make changes. 60th International Human Right Day was the event celebrated.

First time for us to conduct it with very strong Indonesian culture. First time the Keroncong songs are played at the compound.

Amazed by how creative the youngs in Medan. Strongly expressed their thoughts, some with angers, some with sadness, some with love...

My hope, for those who attended, were really touched by the messages in the songs and poetries.Personally, for me sitting there in the corner, I thought I will do whatever to bridge the understanding.. and listening to the songs.. I will do the most for my future generations.

Sadar...

2008-12-03T09:45:00.000-08:00

Sadar.. susah untuk mau sadar. Cenderung lupa akan fakta yang membentang. Katanya hidup tanpa mimpi bagaikan mati, tapi hidup terlalu bermimpi juga membunuh....

Kadang aku berpikir, kapan sebenarnya kita sampai pada titik sadar.. sadar bahwa kita ini mahkluk kecil yang pada akhirnya gak berdaya? tapi dengan segala kegagahan seolah kita bisa menaklukkan dunia.

Malam-malam yang panjang melihat alur buih yang tertinggal di belakang kapal, geladak yang basah oleh embun malam, laut hitam membentang... seharusnya membuat sadar, bahwa kita, aku dan kamu, hanyalah seperti buih... tapi kenapa susah untuk sadar???

Hela nafas panjang, dalam diam kami berpikir.. sepanjang ada kemauan untuk sadar, mungkin masih banyak peluang. Meraih mimpi dalam sadar sesungguhnya yang terbaik - karena hidup bukan angan-angan... hidup adalah mimpi yang menjadi kenyataan.

Sadar...

Pemimpin yang adil (by Rachma)

2008-10-27T23:31:00.001-07:00

Siang itu aku membuka email yang dikirim oleh seorang teman. Tentang Muhammad. Subhanallah,.. luar biasa Allah memberi kesempatan bagi umat di era ini untuk bisa belajar soal Muhammad via internet! Bayangin, ketemu aja belum, tapi rasanya kok menggugah hati luar biasa.

Aku jadi berpikir, siapa dari para pemimpin yang ada sekarang ini yang bisa mencontoh paling gak sekelumiiiiiit aja dari sifat Muhammad. Kita semua pemimpin. Di lingkungan masing-masing paling tidak. Ada gak kita mencoba untuk adil? Adil dalam versi apa?

Sering dalam malam, sambil minum kopi, aku dan Putra berdiskusi soal manusia. Banyak dari kita hanya mengatakan orang itu benar, atau baik, jika sesuai dengan standard kita. Tetapi jika lain sedikit saja dari apa yang kita inginkan maka dia "beda". Akan tetapi bagaimana dengan keadilan?

Hmm.. seandainya saja keadilan itu masih diterapkan oleh semua pemimpin. Bayangkan, Muhammad mengatakan akan memenggal tangan anaknya jika ia mencuri (banyak yang mikir pendek: Gila! Tangan anak sendiri dipenggal). Akan tetapi arti kalimat itu tidak pernah dipikirkan oleh para pemimpin bahwa: walau itu orang yang mereka cintai sekalipun, kalau memang tidak layak mendapatkan sesuatu, atau wajib dihukum, maka keadilan harus ditegakkan.

Hmm.. untuk hati dan pikiran kami, paling nggak akan ada hari perhitungan. Dimana keadilan akan menjadi yang setinggi-tingginya. Mereka yang lupa, bisa kita ingatkan. Pemimpin yang sudah diingatkan tapi gak mau dengar... ya.. itu urusannya...

Paling tidak, aku bersyukur hidup di antara pemimpin-pemimpin yang baik.

obral kaos kaki bolong!

2008-08-08T01:47:00.000-07:00

Bagaikan pasar loak saling tawar menawar akan sebuah resolusi. Padahal hidup ini seharusnya dinilai seperti barang yang masih baru. Dihargai dan dijaga, bukan langsung berkoar-koar menyebutkan nilai harga banting.

Kasihan, banyak yang malah memilih untuk menjadi barang loak selamanya. Mending kalau menjadi barang loak antik yang pasti selalu berharga. Ini hanya menjadi seperti kaus kaki bolong busuk yang satu manusiapun enggan memakainya.

Hidup yang singkat, tetapi selalu memamerkan harga kaus kaki bolong. Bah!

Naifnya, banyak yang lebih mau memakai kaus kaki bolong busuk itu dan berlaku seolah-olah semua memuji. Padahal sebenarnya manusia yang ada di sekita sudah muak seperti menelan muntah sendiri...

Iya, aku lagi muak!

4th of July celebration - inauguration of new office

2008-07-05T04:33:00.000-07:00

Yet, another fun came in front of my face. Regardless all the annoying hub-bub that keep repeating over and over, I think of this event organizing / design / program part of the work as 'pleasure'.

Luckyly I have this as hobby, otherwise, concerning the time and limited fund we have, just don't know what is going to happen. Hanging the 51 state flags plus 1 giant flag that I thought would be a challange turned out to be fine. Thanks to all the crew, the usual Pak Kamal, Ucok, Eka, Henni, also the crew from Traders, Pak Bob Widjaya! and not too forget Uniland staff. Working with good people is fun and worthed! definitely...

The night, also MC-ed the show, dresses up in red and lots of smile and a bit dance to the Street Beat band who were playing the music....ta ta....

Sacred Legacy Exhibition in Medan

2008-02-15T04:26:00.000-08:00

Well, working at Pol Econ port folio does not mean I am stuck with no connection to art any longer. Thank God for that! Lots required to get the business done, especially in programming, decorating, and producing items that actually, in some ways, sort of full fill my desire in art and craft.

I was given the responsibility to set upthe opening in both Medan and Palembang, as well as the set up in Medan. This exhibiton drew attention of hundreds of public eyes. We invited schools students, media group, government officials. The pictures just spoke hundred of words in their stillness -

However, behind the scene, I have to put 2 thumbs up to the collegues who supported me in the project. Kudos to Henni, Kamal, Suhadi, Ucok and Eka! This is the people who I can count on for team work. In this blog I would like to show my appreciation to them. It was a relieved to know there are people who are actually working for the sake of getting the job done right, with professional result, and worthed to many. In my eyes these are people with value.

Some of the samples of craft and work that I designed for the Sacred Legacy Exhibition at Sun Plaza and another opening in Palembang.

Who knew? next job will be event organizer.... (NAAHHH!!!)

Sama siapa lagi bicara kalau nggak dengan Dad..

2008-01-29T17:28:00.000-08:00

Dad, sudah cukup lama tidak bertemu

Sepertinya aku tahu sekarang susahnya menjalani hidup

jika tanpa iman dan prinsip

Tapi dunia seperti ombak besar Dad, menerjang dari segala sisi - membawa ke pasir pantai

Sayangnya pasir siang itu panas...

Kadang Dad, ingin bertemu untuk bertukar pikiran

Kami ingin hanya menumpahkan.... yah ..

anak-anak yang tidak punya tiang....

Hanya sekedar untuk menenangkan hati,

kata demi kata yang sering menyadarkan

bahwa semua bukan milik kita

Hingga aku malu... sama pemiliknya...

Dad, mungkin dirimu senang di sana

Kadang kami membicarakan senyummu

Membicarakan kekuatanmu,

membicarakan uluran tanganmu,

yang selalu menjembatani

dan menjadi pintu damai kami

Dad, sampaikan salam kami padaNya

agar kami juga nanti bisa duduk bersama

Minum teh bersama ...

dan aku... ya ... aku akan lagi bercerita seperti dulu...

mungkin soal teman, soal sekolah, soal kerja...

dan dia..

dia akan duduk mendengarkan Dad...

mendengarkan setiap uraian kata dan amanahmu...

untuk menjagaku

Mungkin nanti Dad tidak perlu menjemputku dari kerja,

atau diantara tumpukan kertas..

memesan nasi soto...

dan diantara kerja, mendengar keluhan...

mungkin nanti akan lebih indah

Mengingatmu Dad

paling tidak membuatku, membuat kami berpikir,

bahwa kekhilafan yang kami ciptakan,

kemarahan yang hadir, emosi, nafsu..

semua itu seharusnya bisa kita hadapi..

dengan otak, dengan perasaan, dengan tidak membiarkan harkat dihina,

dan dalam jalurNya...

Hanya saja Dad,

semoga uraian ini membuat aku,

membuat kami, semakin kuat dan dewasa

Semoga saja membuat kami bisa

membuka hati mereka yang juga gundah....

Seperti kegundahan kami pagi ini....

You Saved Me

2008-01-22T00:27:00.001-08:00

Recycled

2008-01-22T00:25:00.001-08:00

Desparately Seeking Suzan

2008-01-15T17:55:00.000-08:00

Judulnya memang sama dengan film Madonna beberapa tahun lalu, film 'jadul'. Madonna dengan ala fashion yang saat ini dianggap norak .. sepatu tinggi dan kaus kaki. Tentang pencarian seseorang.

Suzan, nama yang familiar, mulai dari masa kecilku ada Suzan, sahabat baik dari SD sampai (tamat SD?), mulai dari main sama, beli buku sama, buka perpusakaan simpan pinjam sama, main sama Daniel sama-sama. Dan setelah 'gede-gede' ketemu lagi di lobby sebuah bank. Suzan yang manis dan baik hati. Kangen euy!

Suzan temen dari temen, di negara dingin bersalju. Gadis muda manis yang baik hati. Sedikit lebih dewasa untuk ukuran badannya yang kecil.

Boneka Suzan, ah itu sih biasa biasa saja. Sekarang juga sudah gak muncul lagi. Lagian mungkin boneka Suzan sudah besar dan sudah kesampean cita-citanya.

Nah Suzan yang ini lain lagi. Suzan yang penuh misteri. Satu hari berkata, "Aku ingin tahu kamu!" Suzan yang penuh dengan harapan erotis untuk mendapatkan jawaban dari gelisah. Suzan yang manis, tapi merasa tersisih. Hanya Tuhan yang tahu jawaban, dan aku, dan dia, dan mereka... tapi Suzan masih merasa tersisih.

Suzan, sudahlah... jangan merasa tersisih, aku sayang kamu! Walau dunia mikir aku aneh.
Suzan, jangan sedih, karena kamu tidak tersisih. Lihat matahari, lihat keluar, semua masih di dekatmu.

Suzan, satu hari mungkin kita bertemu. Aku ingin.

[by Rachma]

After quiet sometime

2008-01-07T01:28:00.000-08:00

Today is the day Dad has been gone for quiet sometime - Still time feels just like yesterday.
For the strongest man I have known in life - I should be strong too, Captain Putra and the girls will also too.

Dad, now we are even more understood - that we have to just uphold the rights, not to fear, be positive and move forward - 'Cos you are our idol.

Hope 'they' will too.

Miss you Dad.

Sarah Anna of Wallingford

2007-10-22T23:54:00.000-07:00

It has been almost 20 years of friendship between me and Sarah Anna - and 'little - not so little anymore' Polly. The friendship that was only started by simple mickey mouse watch and bead bracelets. It was in the IB Art class in Schenley, 8th period, in between jeans, pottery and paint - we actually got to become the longest and most multi cultural friend.

The conversation continued over some great home made chocolate chip cookies of Wallingford, made by Sandra and fresh milk in the kitchen.

I remembered Polly came home in her white shirt and shorts that summer and zoomed to the TV room, which again by surprise we both found that we have this craze for Sesame Street show - why not! we are the kiddiest high school girls at that time - but we ejoyed it.

Now, me with kids, a husband. work, and running around between dishes and laundy... all grown - Sarah Anna with her Four Starr Frame Shope in Stonington, photographies and bird nest hunting.. also grown. Indeed we hardly put any flowers on our shoes anymore, or play with water sprinklers, or share some coins for french vanilla ice cream... Today, we share the peach, art work, drive (gosh.. never imagine 20 years ago that we would actually change our bike rides to car rides - will never give up biking though!), organic yoghurt, talk about life, politics, guys, family, religion, work.. EH! work ...(sigh), laws .... just about everything! But the magic is still there!

Coming back to the U.S. in 2000 was a BIG surprise. Never imagined it - then coming back again in 2004 was another surprise.. and recently, just last September.. it was like an omen!!! and.. the magic is still there! Just like meeting at Yum Wok intersection and right away go to Shadyside for window shopping or look at cool cards. And yet.. we found ourselves still love each other greatly - and yet we found ourselves, when we are together, never become grown ups! We are still the same girls from 20 years ago who just love each other so much - from the heart and mind.

Sarah Anna! miss you bunch!

Congrat babe!

2007-08-08T02:34:00.000-07:00

Wah setelah jauh selama setaon aja.. akhirnya membuahkan hasil.. gw rela deh..rela rela.. ngurusin keriting ding ding duo Dasha Aqila - yang penting ada elmu yang nambah, ya gak..

Well, babe.. next time is my turn :o)

Congratulation sweety!

just a day after your birthday, Dad!

2007-03-26T01:34:00.000-07:00

I guess birthday is different in every stage of life - to a Dad that lives forvevr inour heart... again we remember all the values he had taught us. No-one is like him and able to replace his place.

Just missing you, Dad! Missing you, Bucik...

If only you are around we might be gathering by now to eat something - and you pay for it too :o)

But our present this year is again different, this year we only hope you have the best life out there and that we will be together again someday...Insya Allah

Happy Birthday, ...

Friendship is from the HEART.... and curly hair???

2007-03-07T16:39:00.000-08:00

Izza Ezziza Siregar and Aqila Humaira Putri .... no, we did not buy them at C4!!!

Message from the Best-est of FRienD who is oceans apart

2007-02-15T17:26:00.000-08:00

BE THE COFFEE (ARE WE NOT BROWN?)

A carrot, an egg, and a cup of coffee...

You will never look at a cup of coffee the same way again. A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word. In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what you see." "Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied. Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft.

The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, mother?"

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water. "Which are you?" she asked her daughter.

"When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?" Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength? Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart? Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor.
If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean? May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy. The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches. When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so at the end, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

You might want to pass this message to those people who mean something to you; to those who have touched your life in one way or another; to those who make you smile when you really need it; to those who make you see the brighter side of things when you are really down; to those whose friendship you appreciate; to those who are so meaningful in your life. If you don't send it, you will just miss out on the opportunity to brighten someone's day with this message!

It's easier to build a child than repair an adult. This is so true.

May we all be COFFEE.

All 'd boyZ in my junior high class (by Rachma)

2007-02-06T19:26:00.000-08:00

Coba.. pada masih kenal kaga???

Berdiri:

Rudy, Pahala, ..., Yudi,...,..., Abdi (semi jongkok..what?, ....

Jongkok:

Ma'mun, Ari, Ari (lagi), Ricky

A-OK 2007 calendar nominations

2007-02-06T19:05:00.000-08:00

Dasha Shamira Putri finally proved that her artwork is considered by the Department of State as one of the best drawings to be printed for the A-OK 2007 calendar... and she was only 4 when she did the drawing.... Her drawing was even used as the cover!!!! Go girl!
Nostalgic overview: This reminds Amie Uni of the time when she won first place at St. Joseph school, beating the elementary students for her 3 colored scenery drawing. And from that they she believes strongly on the power of Al-Fatihah and Al-Ikhlas... as Dasha's Neni always said, that time " Be confident adek (that time was meant for Amie Dasha)... work hard and pray ask for Allah's blessing... Insya Allah good things will come to you" and.. it worked before... it works now..

So Dasha.. and Aqila.. and 'another one' if ever going to arrive at our Rumah Batoe Puteh bunch.. this hopefully will teach you that as long as you have good and strong will, you focus, you work hard and believe in Allah.. it will come to you..

Congratulations Dasha! Keep up the good work...
[Note: A-Ok Calendar Competitions is a pretty challanging drawing competitions of children of American and local staff who works at the foreign mission. The theme was "Living Safely Overseas" Dasha was joining the competions among thousands of this group of children around the world. End Note]

Labaik Allahuma Labaik

2006-12-07T22:39:00.001-08:00

Ketika panggilan untuk beribadah telah berkumandang, terasa gigil kulit mengingat penggalan penggalan kisah hidup - kemaafan itu telah ada Ia berikan, nikmat yang berlimpah, masa yang penuh rasa... tapi apa kami sanggup untuk selalu menjaga?

Ummi, atau yang dipanggil Neni oleh dua peri kecil kami, dan kedua sepupu mereka yang seperti hilang ditelan lautan.. jauh... tak berbekas... - pergi menghadap panggilan ibadahmu ya Allah - begitu juga dengan Jaddi dan Jaddati...

Sore itu terasa kehangatan, ada keluarga, adik, tante, om, sepupu. Ada tawa, foto bersama yang sepertinya tidak pernah habis - ada kekosongan di hati, Daddy..atau Bucik, yang mungkin jika diberi kesempatan oleh Allah, mengintip kami dengan senyumnya yang khas dari Syurga... Insya Allah

Tikar yang terbentang dilipat, waktu kunjung yang telah habis... seandainya mereka tahu banyak jiwa yang berharap bukan untuk kebaikan mereka saja yang pergi, tetapi akhir yang baik buat kami semua dalam menghabiskan masa.. selagi ada kesempatan diberikan Allah.

Kalau saja semua yang tahu warga Rumah Batoe Puteh, apa yang mereka rasa dan pikir...

There are times for Angels..

2006-11-30T22:01:00.000-08:00

SMA 8 Medan Plus and Pluses...

2006-11-30T20:52:00.000-08:00

Next Camping Ground

2006-11-29T20:44:00.000-08:00

Silaturahmi ...the silly, the serious.. NOT! hee hee... (by Rachma)

2006-11-29T19:13:00.000-08:00

Silaturahmi itu perlu.. paling gak bagi ku it is amazaing if one can keep friendship to last a long time.. Satu.. aku dan Sarah Anna.. sudah 16 tahun best bosom friend.. nah kali ini yang menakjubkan bagiku adalah pertemanan anak anak SMA 8 Medan yang tamat tahun 1991...

Begitu akrabnya sampe aku gak merasa kalo mereka itu temennya Putra, tapi seperti temen SMAku juga.. jadi serasa SMA di Medan juga.. dan kerennya, pertemanan yang sudah dijaga hampir 20 tahun ini, menular ke kami kami sang istri-istri.. (walau rasanya tua banget menyebut judul istri-istri...

hmm boys, hope it will be continued to our siblings.. the second generation of SMA 8 bunch... (dulu ex SMP 11...) go parbus!!!

Coolness!.. hee hee

Ada Julesta Putra, Ferry Drian, Mahmul Ahyar, Muh. Fadli [Pincuk], Muh, Syafri [Oom Sapi.. kata anaknya Ahyar..], Heri Budiansyah [Epim], Herianto Herlambang [Katong], Muh. Ihsan [ Oni Ombol], Wahyu Abdillah [Why...why...?], Erwan Mahmul [Opick... by Uni's version], Surya Suhendra, and Benny...

Keep it up!

Happy Birthday Little Lady Dasha !!!

2006-11-28T19:04:00.000-08:00

Hmm.... this morning is great! feels like a special day already! Dasha is finally five and just yesterday she learned that she has to know how to count first before she "jajan di sekolahan" and ... Jajan is not that great really because it is better to save the money for something more useful... Hemat Dasha!.. :o)

"Amie, so is this mean I can tell my friends that I am five now? But in school I am six, right?" Correct! a big girl should know to finish her milk and eat nicely.. and know to do their homework without having her Amie telling her to do so...

Our girl is a little lady now... May Allah give the best for her.. as for now, time to hunt for birthday present and a little surprise party!

We love you, Dasha! Happy birthday, girl!

Ultah Perkawinan dan Cinta Jarak Jauh (by Rachma)

2006-09-30T19:02:00.000-07:00

Baru aja baca blog Esti dengan judul week end husband, tapi ya sutralah.. sekarang emang bukan weekend husband, tapi holiday husband...

Sejak Putra kuliah lagi di USM, Malaysia, ya semua serba ngurus sendiri di Medan. Sebenarnya ini sudah komitmen kami berdua, semua harus bersedia untuk saling support untuk kemajuan - yah... itung itung ini kan ngemodalin juga buat kerja dan wawasan. Ternyata hidup sendiri itu rumit, apalagi kalau udah kebiasaan ada yang ngrusuin, even though I can survive.

Yah, setelah 15 tahun sama.. ini termasuk dari masa 'buddies" sampe sekarang - kita masih tetap 'best-est buddies.... sepertinya masih ok ok saja.. tapi seperti masih kemaren duduk di musholla teknik USU, atau sama sama naik sudaco ke Nomensen buat fotocopy pakai kertas kuning khusus, atau ber-sepeda ria ke kampus.. as always...

Tujuh tahun yang lalu di waktu yang sama Daddy menikahkan kami, waktu itu saksi dan ustadz semua dari orang orang yang kami sayang. Waktu itu seperti semua akan tetap sama.. ternyata waktu dan masa membuat perubahan. Tahun ini tidak ada lagi sms 'selamat' dari Daddy, tahun ini tidak ada 'perayaan kecil kecilan' selain telpon 2 jam yang jelas akan membengkakkan rekening. Yah.. semua itu ada tempat dan masanya.

Today, sweety, I would like to say Happy 7th Wedding Anniversary. You're always the best in my heart and mind. Your patience, kindness, support, love are endless - thank you for sharing your life with me, Dasha and Aqila.

Happy Anniversary, Abach!

Just the Two of Us

2006-09-19T19:01:00.000-07:00

Selamat Jalan Daddy.. (By Rachma)

2006-01-07T18:58:00.000-08:00

That afternoon I still remember when out of the blues the phone strike me with the most fearing news I have ever faced - and I knew, as my Dad always said, that we have to prepare for the day when our love one will be gone.

"Gak ada yang abadi di dunia ini, adek!...itulah makanya kita hanya harus berharap ke Allah... suatu saat kita semua akan menghadapi hal seperti ini.. sementara kita sering lupa akan masa..." That was said just before he went for Hajj Pilgrim a couple of years ago... and indeed brought tears to my eyes.

I was just holding Aqila when Putri called and asked what happened with Dad. I was confused, I called Ummi and she was just crying softly asking me to see them. Still today, I though this can not be happening to me, my Dad was perfectly healthy and fine. He was just teaching his classes as always, he was just picking up Ummi from taking care of Ara, my niece who had the dengue fever.

But Allah said it's the time. And tonight I know Allah is very fair. He took my Dad away from me when I can be on my own. He took him just in the right time that it was perfect for my Dad, my Ummi and for everyone that he leaves behind.

Right now, hearing the Quran reading softly in my ears, seeing my Dad on the Acehnese wooden bed that he chose himself just a couple of months before, remembering what my Dad said just last December.. that some how we talked about deaths .... and life, I can still see my Dad laid just like he is sleeping. I never had the heart to wake him up before - I knew he was always tired from work... and now I still feel like he is sleeping and that he will wake up and then ask me to make him some tea.

Many came, students, colleagues, relatives, friends... many respects shown to his great work. But no one knew how a great father he is. How he always taught great lesson for us to stay honest at our work and life, how humble he has always been, how us, Ummi, Putri and I, are always the first that comes to his considerations.... His dedication to education, his dedication to his family. His time, so busy of his time, that he always divide to listen to us.

"Dad, can you pick me up for lunch? Putra is busy,.. treat me some Nasi Soto?" and "Yeah, sure!" is always the answer... or little sms asking to eat dim sum at Nelayan... or even a call, "Dad, can you pick me up? I need to talk..."

No-one at all can replace his position, I knew he went in the best way. Allah loves him for all his kindness. No-one will be like my Dad... all I know now is Putra and I are always trying to be at least almost like him...

What is left behind is nothing, but perhaps how some people said that I look like him a bit, or... maybe his books..tons of books... his students who always admire him.... his work at USU. Nothing is left behind but all the good values he had taught me, all the experience he had shown me....

No more "Dek, pijitin Daddy, dek!" or "Dek, gambarin karikatur untuk slide Daddy, dek.." or "Dek, malam minggu ke mana? Yok lah... kita pergi rame rame ke ...maunya ke mana Dek...?" or to Putra... "Les (he calls Putra Jules...), gimana cara jalanin program ini yaaa?" or "Les, yok, cek mobil ke bengkel... " or...."Les, jaga si Dek Uni ya, dia suka males jaga diri.."

But sure is I remember him at all time in my heart - can't decide which should come first...

"I love you Daddy, sure will miss you! Hope I can do my best here.. supaya kita bisa ketemu lagi di surga ya Dad.. Insya Allah.."

Candi candi

2004-10-01T07:21:00.000-07:00

Ia bagaikan Borobudur, kamu bagaikan Prambanan
Tertambat mata memandang dewa, diam dalam susunan pasir bisu
Eksotis cerita yang menghampar, yang satu mengumbar kejayaan,

yang lain menarikan falsafah cinta
Ia bagaikan Borobudur, dan kamu itu adalah Prambanan

Silau dihantam bayangan stupa, ingin meraih matahari agaknya
Tetapi matahari itu jauh Borobudur! Bangunlah, lihatlah sekelilingmu
Tanpa pohon, tanpa kamera dan turis turis yang mabuk matahari tenggelam
Tanpa para biksu di malam Waisak, hanyalah stupa
Tapi sialan! aku terlanjur silau

Candi candiku akan larut, habis tak berbekas ditelan masa
Aku dipeluk dalam pasir Prambanan, mendekam dalam stupa Borobudur
Puisimu berlomba

Candi candiku
Dimana guratan bayang akan terukir? Hanyalah terukir dari pasir
Hasrat semata

[tau gak? sore itu hanya kami pribumi yang 'diizinkan' oleh penjaga Borobudur yang 'ramah' untuk menikmati tenggelamnya raja langit. mungkin hanya karena mereka bingung, ini pribumi apa bukan? Soalnya kami bicara pakai bahasa Inggris - kasihan! bangsa sendiri menolak teman sebangsanya untuk bisa menikmati alam Indonesia di Borobudur, hanya karena patrian di kepala mereka akan status] Seandainya saja kami pakai bahasa Jawa... atau bahasa Aceh... - potret pikiran komunitas kita]

Spring come and see me

1989-01-22T00:23:00.000-08:00

Spring that time came and saw me. Done in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, 1989