That afternoon I still remember when out of the blues the phone strike me with the most fearing news I have ever faced - and I knew, as my Dad always said, that we have to prepare for the day when our love one will be gone.
"Gak ada yang abadi di dunia ini, adek!...itulah makanya kita hanya harus berharap ke Allah... suatu saat kita semua akan menghadapi hal seperti ini.. sementara kita sering lupa akan masa..." That was said just before he went for Hajj Pilgrim a couple of years ago... and indeed brought tears to my eyes.
I was just holding Aqila when Putri called and asked what happened with Dad. I was confused, I called Ummi and she was just crying softly asking me to see them. Still today, I though this can not be happening to me, my Dad was perfectly healthy and fine. He was just teaching his classes as always, he was just picking up Ummi from taking care of Ara, my niece who had the dengue fever.
But Allah said it's the time. And tonight I know Allah is very fair. He took my Dad away from me when I can be on my own. He took him just in the right time that it was perfect for my Dad, my Ummi and for everyone that he leaves behind.
Right now, hearing the Quran reading softly in my ears, seeing my Dad on the Acehnese wooden bed that he chose himself just a couple of months before, remembering what my Dad said just last December.. that some how we talked about deaths .... and life, I can still see my Dad laid just like he is sleeping. I never had the heart to wake him up before - I knew he was always tired from work... and now I still feel like he is sleeping and that he will wake up and then ask me to make him some tea.
Many came, students, colleagues, relatives, friends... many respects shown to his great work. But no one knew how a great father he is. How he always taught great lesson for us to stay honest at our work and life, how humble he has always been, how us, Ummi, Putri and I, are always the first that comes to his considerations.... His dedication to education, his dedication to his family. His time, so busy of his time, that he always divide to listen to us.
"Dad, can you pick me up for lunch? Putra is busy,.. treat me some Nasi Soto?" and "Yeah, sure!" is always the answer... or little sms asking to eat dim sum at Nelayan... or even a call, "Dad, can you pick me up? I need to talk..."
No-one at all can replace his position, I knew he went in the best way. Allah loves him for all his kindness. No-one will be like my Dad... all I know now is Putra and I are always trying to be at least almost like him...
What is left behind is nothing, but perhaps how some people said that I look like him a bit, or... maybe his books..tons of books... his students who always admire him.... his work at USU. Nothing is left behind but all the good values he had taught me, all the experience he had shown me....
No more "Dek, pijitin Daddy, dek!" or "Dek, gambarin karikatur untuk slide Daddy, dek.." or "Dek, malam minggu ke mana? Yok lah... kita pergi rame rame ke ...maunya ke mana Dek...?" or to Putra... "Les (he calls Putra Jules...), gimana cara jalanin program ini yaaa?" or "Les, yok, cek mobil ke bengkel... " or...."Les, jaga si Dek Uni ya, dia suka males jaga diri.."
But sure is I remember him at all time in my heart - can't decide which should come first...
"I love you Daddy, sure will miss you! Hope I can do my best here.. supaya kita bisa ketemu lagi di surga ya Dad.. Insya Allah.."
